Granny, get your wellies on! It's Glastonbury Weekend!
And that can only mean one thing.
That I've been wading knee-deep in mud and enduring foul and unsanitary conditions at every turn.
Which is a bit worrying, as I've been watching it on TV, in my living room.
To be honest. I can't say Glasto has set my candle alight this year. I did my best to give Florence and the Machine a go - as I do every year, feeling the woman must be doing something right or she wouldn't keep getting invited back - but, just like every year, the secret of her popularity eluded me. Paloma Faith had bags of enthusiasm but possibly not bags of good songs. Burt Bacharach has plenty of good songs but I'd rather see other people perform them. The sight of Kanye West all alone on stage, seemingly performing to himself and himself alone, possessed an air of almost tragi-comic futility that suggests that, if the performance hadn't existed, Samuel Beckett would have had to invent it.
Still, there's all tonight's action to look forward to and if the current weekend does let me down I've always got a different weekend to fall back on.
That's the weekend of exactly forty years ago, way back when Kanye West was only boasting of being the greatest living sperm on Earth.
The Prowler's STILL stopping Spidey from getting to that airport.
Thanks to the magic pencil of Lord Barrington Windsington Smithington, Dr Strange is still up against Nightmare.
I generally try to avoid making definitive statements on the internet, as they're always instantly proven wrong by people who know more than I do but that genuinely has to be the worst-drawn cover I've ever seen on a professionally produced comic.
Those naughty apes are still causing trouble for fun-loving astronauts everywhere.
Conan battles dutifully on but cancellation is now only weeks away.
Unless I miss my ever-loving guess, this is the start of the Captain Axis/Shaper of Worlds tale.
Long-standing readers will be amazed to hear me declare this to be one of my favourite Hulk tales. Something I so rarely do.
I genuinely have no knowledge of this story at all.
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