What a magnificent figure of a man stands to the left of this breathless prose. No wonder Sue Storm was infatuated with him, with his big pointy prongy thing that he could jab into the ground.
As we all know, that is the man the world knows as the Submareena.
Except it isn't.
It's the man the world knows as the Sub-Marinna. But, for many a year, when I was younger, I thought he was named in honour of submarines, rather than mariners. Thus was my ignorance complete until my dad one day put me right.
But it seems I'm not alone. Judging by comments on this blog, over the last few days, others too have had problems pronouncing all sorts of things comic book related.
I still remember how my favourite Marvel artist when I was young was John Bus-Schemer.
Over at DC, who could fail to love the work of Alfredo Alkayla? Or was it Alkahla? Or was it Alkallaah? Or was it something else altogether?
Then there was Paul Gulacy, the master of the Master of Kung-Fu. To this day, I still don't have a clue how Gulacy is pronounced. I can think of at least a dozen ways in which it could be said.
Then again, for a long time, I thought Shang-Chi rhymed with bullseye rather than with debris.
Once upon a time, I thought Conan was Connun, Loki was Locky and Ka-Zar was Kuh-Zaahh.
Clearly this madness can't go on. It's a matter that needs urgent attention. So, are there any characters, artists or writers whose names you could never work out how to pronounce? If so, here's where you can break your silence and tell the world about it.
Keep Those Things Away From Me - Novel
11 months ago