March 13th, 1976 - Marvel UK, 50 years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

We all need things in our life we can love and, this week in 1976, Tina Charles was taking it to the limit, as she was telling everyone she knew - and didn't know - that, "I Love to Love." Still, it wasn't doing her any harm. She was, as she had been the week before, at the very summit of the UK singles chart, thanks to the song of that name.

Also retaining its Number One status was The Very Best of Slim Whitman. This time, on the corresponding LP chart.

As we all know, I Love to Love is an irresistibly bouncy bundle of catchiness that we'll never forget but there were other tracks I approved of on that week's UK singles chart. And among them were:

Dat - Pluto Shervington

Squeeze Box - the Who

Mamma Mia - ABBA

(If Paradise is) Half as Nice {1976} - Amen Corner

and 

Yesterday - by the Beatles.

For any brave soul who wishes to delve deeper into the subject, that UK singles chart lives here.

While the corresponding album rankings dwell within.

Looking at that singles chart, it is striking that there are two versions of Let's Do the Latin Hustle on it. One at Number 20 and the other, directly beneath, it at 21.

And, just to add to the confusion, we can also find (Do the) Spanish Hustle by the Fatback Band at Number 10.

Clearly, you were no one, in March 1976, if you didn't know how to hustle.

It's a ground-breaking moment for us all, I'll be bound, as my favourite Defender makes her senses-shattering debut!

Or does she?

Is she, instead, the Enchantress, in disguise, seeking to gain revenge upon all men because she's been dumped by the Executioner?

I suspect she is.

But you have to hand it to the Valkyrie. There aren't many super-doers who could have three different alter-egos in their first three appearances.

But, of course, it means we also get the first and - as far as I'm aware - last appearance of the Lady Liberators, when the Masters of Evil decide to wreck a load of people's Halloween celebrations.

And what of Conan?

Neal Adams takes over on the art front, as the battling barbarian must survive The Curse of the Golden Skull.

I don't know much about this week's Iron Fist tale but I do know it's called Valley of the Damned and, presumably, we shouldn't confuse it with the classic films Village of the Damned, Children of the Damned nor the obscure favourite These are the Damned.

And we end the issue with a Lee, Lieber, Kirby short classic in which the owner of a factory that uses only robots is, himself, revealed to be a machine!

Can it be?

Have Spider-Man and Dr Strange teamed up again, so soon after they last did so?

No.

They haven't.

Instead, our lead adventure's one in which the wonderful web-spinner delivers the defeated Martin Blank into the care of the nearest hospital before then running into the surprise return of Dr Octopus, while out searching for the missing Aunt May!

As for Dr Strange; in his strip, he's still inside the Eye of Agamotto - with the Silver Surfer - and now encounters a bunch of people who seem to be the Defenders but aren't. This means we get two doses of the Valkyrie in the same week.

After that, the Thing and Captain America accidentally find themselves on a future Earth ruled by the ruthless Badoon. I can only suspect a meeting with the Guardians of the Galaxy is on its way!

Then, Iron Man has a scrap on his hands when none other than the Incredible Hulk acts oddly out of character by kidnapping Janice Cord!

Next, Loki's fled Asgard, to escape the attack of Surtur but Thor and his friends stay behind in a bid to prevent the rampaging fire demon from destroying the kingdom

All of that's great, of course, but what really matters, to me, is that, if the cover's to be believed, I'll get a free colour sticker!

Of what, I cannot say. 

Judging by that cover, things are getting shouty on the Planet of the Apes.

But why not? It's a well-known fact that Shouty on the Planet of the Apes was going to be the next film in the series, after Battle but, sadly, they changed their minds and it never got made.

As we can probably guess, we've reached the stage in Conquest in which Caesar's stirring up rebellion among the apes.

And, speaking of obstreperous primates, the Black Panther's still battling those legendary giant white gorillas of Wakanda - and showing them they won't be taking over the planet while he's around.

Elsewhere, having taken SHIELD's latest Super-Soldier serum, the somewhat elderly Victorius is out to show Ka-Zar who's boss.

And it looks like he might just succeed!

In this thrilling issue, Frank Drake encounters Brother Voodoo while, in London, the star of the comic has a run-in with the busies.

Next, Jack Russell, Topaz and Buck take a holiday in the snowy wilderness, along with Buck's new girlfriend and her young daughter.

But how long can it be before the Werewolf by Night starts to see that child as a potential snack?

And Man-Thing is in caught up in a tale called Cry of the Native!

I think it's the question we've all asked; "Who'd win a fight between the Hulk and the Juggernaut?"

And this is the week in which we get our answer!

Although, come to think of it, I don't think we do, as an intervention by Professor X brings the whole battle to a sudden halt.

Daredevil, meanwhile, gets another crack at Mr Fear, despite his disaster against the villain, last time out.

And it turns out the villain is, in fact, Starr Saxon in disguise!

But not for long, he's not, because he then plunges to his death from his big flying disk-thing.

Rather more fortunate are the Fantastic Four who wrap-up their first encounter with Annihilus, just in time to get back the Earth and give Sue the dose of cosmic energy she needs in order to survive her current ailment.

And even more in time for the birth of Reed and Sue's baby!

Following that, we get a Lee/Kirby short in which a fleeing criminal takes refuge in a barber's shop.

Only to discover it has its own way of dispensing justice.

"Lo! The Eggs Shall Hatch!"

I'm not convinced that's going to go down as one of the great story titles of all time.

Regardless, I have no doubt it'll be a stressful situation for Nick Fury.

Elsewhere, the Juggernaut's won his battle with the X-Men and, given the magical nature of his powers, it looks like they're going to have to recruit the aid of Dr Strange and the Ancient One if they hope to win the rematch.

But if the X-Men think they've got problems, that's nothing compared to Captain America who's up against a Red Skull who now owns the Cosmic Cube and is determined to make use of it!

Captain Marvel's still grappling with the nuclear menace of Megaton.

And, as referenced in last week's post, Prince Byrrah has gained control of Atlantis!

And, now, in alliance with Krang and Attuma, he only goes and banishes Namor, a man you'd have thought must be used to that sort of thing by now.

The Marvel Lucky Bag - March 1986.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Thrills, spills and life-changing shocks. That's what I expect when I enter a cinema.

And that's just from eating a choc ice.

But what of the films that were awaiting us as we entered the place of which Elvis Costello once remarked that stars are only painted on the ceiling above?

March 1986 was a month which saw the unleashing of such gems as The Care Bears Movie II: A New Generation, Highlander, Crossroads, Police Academy 3: Back in Training and The Money Pit.

I must confess I don't think I've seen any of those - not even The Care Bears Movie II - but I'm going to have a guess that Highlander is the best of the bunch, as I've actually heard people talking about it, unlike the others.

However, there is always the possibility that I could be wrong in my assessment.

In other news, seeing that list has made me realise that - whenever I see the words, "Care Bears," - inside my head, I'm seeing Ewoks.

The fight-happy puritan continues to sustain his own comic and, in this issue, he's, somehow, among a shipful of slaves delivered to the Caliph Abu-Ben Ar.

It sounds bad for our hero... ...but, perhaps all is not lost, as Caliph Abu-Ben Ar's son is a man who wants to do away with slavery!

Marvel's sprawlingest-ever epic reaches its, no doubt, senses-shattering conclusion, with the Beyonder in a quandary because he's vowed to destroy all of existence but fears he might miss it when it's gone.

That in mind, he, for some reason, sets out to create a machine which will recreate him as a mortal - but with a portion of his power intact.

Now what are our heroes supposed to do?

And how does the Molecule Man fit into it all?

I don't know if the world was ever crying out for a Wonder Man comic but it's got one anyway, and one that's destined to last for a whole single issue!

In that one single issue, Simon acquires and - loses - employment as a security guard for Cordco Delta Lab 3.

And, as if that wasn't enough to keep us enthralled, we also get a reminder of his origin story!

I've not looked at Web of Spider-Man for a while on this feature but the Grand Comics Database tells me the brother of one of the punks from the previous issue is out to murder Peter Parker!

Sadly, as I've not read that previous issue, I can shed no light upon who those punks might be. Possibly, the Sex Pistols but I feel the UK Subs are also acting mightily suspiciously.

And, now, Firestar outdoes Wonder Man by getting her own mini-series.

One in which her powers show themselves for the first time, triggered by the demise of her grandmother.

Needless to say, it's not long before she gets noticed  - and is recruited by the White Queen!

And it's all thanks to Tom DeFalco and Mary Wilshire.

I've no idea at all what happens in this one but I do know it's the last issue, that the tale within it is called Eyeteeth Part III: Army In the Pocket and is brought to us by the mighty talents of Doug Moench and Paul Gulacy.

And, finally, for this month, as far as I can make out, more of the expected fun occurs when Sage becomes a king - only for Groo to turn up.

Forty years ago today - March 1986.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

What new adventures await us as we prepare to dip our toes into the pool of hindsight?

As far as I can recollect, this month's issue's largely a remake of last month's, with Thor, once more, helping his fellow New York frogs defeat a gang of unfriendly New York rats.

Although, this time, he does so with the help of a magic flute and a bunch of alligators.

While he's at it, he also gets his hands on Mjölnir and regains his super-powers.

He then sets off to Asgard, in search of a showdown with the man to blame for it all - Loki.

Now safely ensconced in the Latverian Embassy, Dr Doom's captured our heroes and is trying to recreate his original body, with the use of his occult powers.

When that fails, he has an even better plan. He'll summon the Beyonder and order him to do it!

The only problem is the Beyonder doesn't like him. Or anyone much.

I do believe that, now having some of the Beyonder's power added to that of the Phoenix, Rachel Summers decides to take another crack at destroying him.

Needless to say, everyone she knows tries to convince her that's a stupid idea.

Things get experimental on the story-telling front when an odd tale sees a whole bunch of different things occur in a whole bunch of different places with a whole bunch of different people and it culminates in a department store Santa trying to rob Peter Parker’s neighbours!

While the mindless Hulk blunders around in the desert, looking for things to smash, Bruce Banner brings together an outcast group of scientists to form a team capable of stopping the brute.

Speaking of which, that's precisely what Doc Samson is also determined to do.

Except he's determined to do it by using the persuasive power of his fists!

We encounter a sad little tale in which the Porcupine, fed up of always losing, decides to quit his life of crime and sell his armour to whoever'll have it.

Well, it turns out Cap'll have it - just so long as Porcy agrees to help him bring the Serpent Society to justice for their murder of MODOK. 

Unfortunately, the prickly plunderer may not live long enough to collect his reward.

I'm struggling to recall anything that happens in this one, other than that the Avengers fight the Beyonder.

And, of course, they get nowhere, in their bid to defeat him.

If the Avengers think they've got problems, they should try being Daredevil.

His life as Matt Murdock now wrecked by the Kingpin's machinations, our hero confronts the villain and ends up being dumped in a river while locked inside a sinking car.

Is this the end for him?

Kingie thinks so.

But perhaps the rotund rascal shouldn't count his chickens before the fat lady sings.

After all, in his time, the man without fear's survived far worse crises than being chucked in a river...

As far as I can make out - from hushed whispers on the internet - Imhotep attacks General Soto's men while the Witch Queen and her daughters hide in a swamp.

I bet Conan and his sword'll have something to say about it all.

In a bid to prevent the Beyonder from destroying his wretched kingdom of misery, Mephisto places a wager with the all-powerful entity. One that will see everyone's favourite web-slinger psychologically tormented by the demon Zarathos, as he tries to foil an assassination attempt on the Kingpin.

Iron Man's got problems too. Madam Masque's mind is in the body of Beth Cabe, and vice versa.

Can the man of ferrous decide just who's who?

And, if he can, can he work out how to get their minds back into the right skulls, without killing the pair of them?

March 6th, 1976 - Marvel UK, 50 years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

For decades, there have been two songs I've always got confused with each other, within the confines of my mind.

Those two songs are Love to Love You Baby by Donna Summer and I Love to Love by Tina Charles.

Now, at last, I know why I get them mixed up. Not only do they have similar titles, they were both on the UK singles chart at the exact same time.

It's true. This very week in 1976, Donna's track was at Number Twenty-One while Tina's ruled supreme at Number One!

Admittedly, I also tend to get Tina Charles mixed up with Teena Marie who I get mixed up with Kelly Marie.

No such confusion for me on the accompanying album chart, that week - even though The Very Best of Slim Whitman was at Number One and The Best of Roy Orbison was at Two.

But can it be?

Our main tale's protagonist and antagonist are both feeling out of sorts?

They surely are. 

Not only has Quincy Harker decided he's too old for vampire hunting, Dracula's decided his own waning powers can only be down to the subterfuge of Dr Sun!

Elsewhere, the Werewolf by Night finally manages to defeat Dr Glitternight. But what a villain Glitternight is. It takes some talent to be outwitted by a werewolf.

And the Man-Thing's tangled up in the machinations of some sort of previous priestess of Atlantis!

I do believe Conan's having a battle with a giant statue.

One that's impervious to the mightiest of his weapons!

And, as we can all tell from that cover, Aries and his gang have captured Manhattan.

But that won't last.

Not with Daredevil about to free the Avengers from his deadly clutches.

But what of deadly knuckles?

Here's where we find out because we finish the issue with the news that Iron Fist is still fighting Iron Man in Tony Stark's factory.

As is quickly apparent, those dastardly fiends the Rhino and Abomination are still causing no end of trouble for our hero, after seizing the Hulkbuster Base.

But can Bruce, Jim and Jim's girlfriend stop whatever it is the villains are up to, before they get round to doing whatever is is they're up to?

Elsewhere, Daredevil's still sulking about his defeat at the hands of Mr Fear.

And he still hasn't managed to find Starr Saxon - the only man who knows his true identity!

In the Negative Zone, Reed Richards manages to drain enough energy from Annihilus's Cosmic Control Rod to save Sue's life when he and his mates get back to Earth.

Assuming, of course, that the larcenous locust will let them go there.

I do believe Conquest of the Planet of the Apes carries along in its not-so-merry way.

Mostly, I believe that because the ape on the front cover says so, and who am I to argue with an armed gorilla?

As for the Black Panther, he's a man who would argue with an armed gorilla.

And we know that because, after fighting wolves, last week, he now has a punch-up with Wakanda's supposedly mythical giant white apes!

Meanwhile, Ka-Zar throws away the super-soldier serum that Nick Fury gave him, and then sets off to lamp Victorius.

On his way there, he defeats Gemini and the Plunderer.

But Victorius may prove to be a tougher opponent, by far.

According to the Bank of England's inflation calculator, that 75p Sea Monkey charge, advertised on the cover, works out at £5.10 in modern money.

This compares to their current price of £10 from Argos.

I have, therefore, no doubt this proves Sea Monkeys to be a better investment than gold.

The Bank of England also tells me this comic's 9p cover price would, nowadays, be 61p and Marvel UK's portrait format comics' 8p price tag would be 54p.

In other news, the Gibbon isn't exactly a man blessed with luck. Following his humiliation at the hands of Spider-Man; this week, he bumps into Kraven who decides to mind-control him into murdering the wall-crawler!

Next, Silver Dagger's trying to get Clea to renounce the "dead" Dr Strange.

Meanwhile, the "dead" Dr Strange has entered his own Eye of Agamotto and is having an encounter with the Silver Surfer, for reasons I struggle to recall.

As for the Thing, he's been left to look after Wundarr who decides it'd be a good idea to release all the animals from the local zoo.

Elsewhere, the Incredible Hulk's under the control of a mystery villain who sends him on a mission to kill Tony Stark.

But is all as it seems?

And Loki's still the ruler of Asgard - thanks to his possession of the Odin Ring. But he quickly comes to realise the job may not be all it's cracked up to be, when Surtur shows up, looking to destroy the kingdom and all within it.

It's giant-sized trouble for the X-Men when the Juggernaut awakens from the coma he's been in.

And he now has Professor X's mental powers!

After that, Prince Byrrah shows up in Atlantis and challenges Subby to a fight to decide which of them should rule the realm.

Needless to say, the villain cheats, making sure the combat zone's littered with hidden weapons and booby traps.

And it looks like his foul plan is going to succeed!

Elsewhere, Rick Jones and his sidekick Captain Marvel must survive an attack by Megaton the Nuclear Man!

And Nick Fury must survive the menace of The Devil's Egg!

Finally, for this issue, Captain America has a major new concern on his hands, as it looks like the Red Skull's managed to steal, from AIM, a brand new device called the Cosmic Cube.

And it can grant its owner the power to do anything!

The Marvel Lucky Bag - March 1976.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Contrary to popular rumour, caves are not available to us all.

But there are things that resemble caves.

They call them cinemas.

And what shall we find if we enter the cinemas of March 1976?

We'll find such attractions as The First Nudie Musical, Black Shampoo, Creature From Black Lake, Robin and Marian, The Man Who Fell to Earth, The Slipper and the Rose and, of course, W.C. Fields and Me. For, it was in that month they were all first released.

Of them, I've seen only The Man Who Fell to Earth - but not for about 45 years and can, therefore, offer few cogent thoughts upon it.

But you know upon what I can be cogent?

Comics!

A hero like no other makes his debut, as Omega the Unknown smashes his way into our lives.

Gasp as Omega does whatever it is that Omega does. And shriek as he doesn't do whatever it is he doesn't do.

I think I've only ever read one issue of his book and, thus, my knowledge and memories of him are fuzzy but I do believe he's from outer space and has ended up on Earth, whereupon he has immediately set about fighting crime, in a distinctly enigmatic manner.

Also, a young boy's involved but I struggle to remember just what he has to do with it all and why.

I've chosen this one because I remember its Jack Kirby pencilled cover appearing in an issue of FOOM, and liking it there.

But it's not whether you're beautiful on the outside that matters. It's whether you're beautiful on the inside. So, just how pleasing are the innards of this one?

Thinking about it, I don't know - and the internet's refusing to tell me - but I think it's a safe bet the Red Skull's involved.

And it seems the Fin, the Patriot and Miss America also put in an appearance.

Readers may be intrigued to hear that Rich Buckler and Dick Ayers provide the artwork.

It's a tale we'll never forget.

And that's good news because it means I haven't forgotten it.

The gang are eagerly pursuing their long-term strategy of aimlessly wandering around, when they encounter a man who's only going to live for 24 hours and must find a mate in that time, or watch his species go extinct.

As Carmilla Frost is the only woman around, that means she finds herself getting volunteered for the role.

Needless to say KR and his mates are not going to put up with that kind of thing.

But can they stop the 24-hour Man's mother, who happens to be a giant, mutant-dragon thing?

Skull the Slayer's still doing stuff that Ka-Zar could be doing.

This time, he's up against some sort of Egyptian type people and someone called Slitherogue who I suspect will be a victim of nominative determinism and will both slither and be a rogue.

But what's this? The Black Knight's also in action? I'm going to assume it's a reprint of a venerable and ancient tale.

The world's greatest non-team continue their idiosyncratic lives, as they battle the Headmen, in a bid to rescue Kyle Richmond's all-important brain.

Only to see it fall into the hands of Nebulon!

I've never read this one. So, all I can announce is it's by Steve Gerber and Frank Brunner and guest stars the unstoppable horror that is the Space Turnip!

And it's another one I've never read.

But I do believe that, in Bruce Jones' and Frank Thorne's mini-epic, Red Sonja must stop a mechanical man called Balek.

Fifty years ago today - March 1976.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Yet again, the past is knocking upon our doors and, like its servants, we have no recourse but to answer it.

I know nothing of The Assassin, other than that he's been hired to kill the Avengers.

But whom has hired him for that task?

It's one I've never read but I do know Conan must overcome warriors on crocodiles, in order to save the village of the Watambi.

Bêlit, meanwhile, gets herself kidnapped.

Did you know alligators are less closely related to crocodiles than people are to chimpanzees? This fact has nothing to do with anything but it's the sort of info you can astound your friends with. Especially the ones who like to ride around on crocodiles.

"The Assassin never fails!"

"Bullseye never misses!"

It's clearly a good month for over-confident villains.

I am quite intrigued that, on a cover which shows Daredevil about to be killed by Bullseye, the blurb declares, "Plus: A Startling New Job For Matt Murdock!" as though anyone not convinced to buy the comic by the threat of their hero's imminent demise would suddenly be moved to purchase it by the promise that he gets a new job.

I've not read this one but I'm assuming that, cured of being the Thing, Ben Grimm can only stand and watch, as Luke Cage takes his place in the team.

I'm assuming that because that's what it says on the cover.

I believe I detect a Berni Wrightson illustration. Is this the only time he ever did a Hulk cover?

Regardless, it's clear our hero takes on the Man-Thing, and that the Collector's involved.

I do believe the Glob also turns up in this tale - but not the one that's previously fought the Hulk.

You know how, on at least two previous occasions, Tony Stark's saved Happy Hogan's life by using his Enervator but it's turned Happy into the not-so-happy Freak?

Well, it's happened again.

You would've thought Tony would have learnt his lesson, by now.

I do believe this issue was drawn by Sal Buscema because Ross Andru was busy drawing the epic Superman vs Spider-Man tale that all 1970s comic fans knew they had to get their hands on.

But a thought does strike me. Is this the Sandman's first Spider-Man appearance since the original Sinister Six story, way back in the days of Steve Ditko?

If so, that seems remarkable, bearing in mind his status as one of Spidey's classic foes.

I believe Thor may still be tangling with the world-mangling menace of the Time Twisters.

"The Savage World of 1984!" I remember it well. Nik Kershaw on the pop charts. Give My Regards to Broad Street in the cinemas. Orville the Duck on TV. It was a living nightmare.

Anyway, it seems that, in the Royalist Forces base, Cap and Falc encounter someone called Cheer Chadwick who forces them to fight in an arena.

And, so, are the greatest heroes that Marvel can provide accounted for.

But it's not the only company with heroes. That in mind, let us take a look at a random sampling of what was occurring in DC's output which bore the same cover date.

It's looking like bad news for Wonder Woman.

And for the rest of the Justice League too, as no sooner is the amazing Amazon back than they have to deal with the terror-inducing nightmare of Nekron who, as far as I can remember, is an alien who can make even the bravest of heroes too scared to do anything.

I always like to see Deadman and the Phantom Stranger on the same cover together.

And that's exactly what I've got, thanks to the moody pencil of Jim Aparo.

As for what happens inside, I have little info, other than that the main tale's called A Time for Endings and the backup strip is Will the Real Black Orchid Please Stand Up?

I shall assume the latter yarn to be the one in which a bunch of female criminals convince an innocent woman they're all the Black Orchid, in order to trick her into doing something or other.

But what's this? The presence of a statement called Epilogue for the Phantom Stranger?

Can it be? Can truly be the last issue of this legendary comic?

Yes, it can. And all I can say is that, truly, there is no justice in the world.

Because it wouldn't be a month in the 1970s without the launch of a brand new comic, DC supplies us with issue #1 of Kobra!

And I know absolutely nothing about it, other than it would appear to feature two symbiotically-linked brothers. One a good guy and the other a villain. 

Maybe it's just me but this all sounds suspiciously similar to Marvel's legendary villain Gemini.

Regardless, it seems that Jack Kirby's heavily involved, in terms of both plot and art.

Another new book hits us between the eyes - and it's an outlet for those antagonist-stopping adolescents the Teen Titans!

As we might expect, from that cover, this is made up almost entirely of reprints from the 1950s and '60s.

Among its deathless content, we encounter such adventures as Monster Bait and Skis of Death! Not to mention the inclusion of a brand new article; Introducing the Teen Titans.

And, as seems compulsory in this era, we discover an instalment of Justice For All Includes Children, to make us rethink our attitude.

There may, as David Bowie insists, be a starman waiting in the sky but, right now, there's also one waiting in our comic shops.

And will he blow our minds?

That, I cannot say, as I've never read this issue but I do know he must face someone called Turran Kha who's been sent to execute him, which seems a little rude.

I've a feeling there may be some conceptual similarities, here, to the early days of Marvel's Captain Marvel strip.

I also know it's all brought to us by Gerry Conway and Mike Vosburg.