July 26th, 1975 - Marvel UK, 50 years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

What was happening atop the twin peaks of UK record sales, this week in 1975?

I'll tell you.

The Number One spot on the British singles chart was held by the Bay City Rollers, still triumphant, thanks to their motivational ballad Give a Little Love.

While, on the accompanying album rankings, the Carpenters reclaimed the crown from Wings, thanks to their LP Horizon.

Blow me down if Marvel UK hasn't gone full-on British.

It's true. Spider-Man's finally seen sense and ditched the skyscrapers of New York for the charms of Merrie Olde Londone.

But it's not that charming, as he must thwart a gang of would-be terrorists before he can even think of seeing Gwen Stacy, the woman he came here to visit.

Half a world away from all that, Iron Man's encountering the Secret in the Castle of Terror! which I believe means he's still having his first run-in with Half-Face.

And Thor's on his way to Rigel to help the Colonisers avoid being eaten by Galactus.

As for that cover, I have noticed that, on the original US version of it, the Houses of Parliament were on display in the background, while, on this UK reprint, they've mysteriously disappeared.

I suspect this may be because someone feared UK readers would know the Houses of Parliament are not next to Tower Bridge.

But who can really know what leads to editorial decisions at the venture?

The Swordsman's back - and still, no doubt, using the flat of his blade!

But before we get to read the tale, we deal with a man who would never use the flat of his blade; Conan.

And I do believe this issue kicks off with the sequence in which the battling barbarian's bezzie brother in brawling - Fafnir - loses his arm.

Following that, the Swordsman sets out to prove he's Clint Barton's superior - even though Clint is now a giant as well as a master bowman.

Dr Strange, meanwhile, has been captured by the followers of Sligguth and even manages to get into a punch-up with the fiend itself, before going for a quick explore around the tunnels beneath the local town.

I do believe this is the one in which Dracula and Rachel van Helsing must work together to survive the Alps, after causing a helicopter crash.

Also struck by aviation misery, are Jack Russell and Topaz who, I think, are stuck at an airport in France, with Jack due to become a werewolf at any moment!

And, like Dracula and Rachel, Frankenstein's Monster and the Berserker robot are getting to know each other in the wilderness.

This time, by having a stroll together in the forest while discussing the nature of life, the universe, and everything.

I don't like to be critical, but how on earth are Brent and Nova not noticing those apes? They're not even trying to hide.

Regardless, at a nearby fountain, Brent is subject to a perplexing mind-control that makes him want to drown Nova. Then, he encounters a man worshipping an atomic bomb. It seems that strange things are afoot.

Speaking of strange things - although, this time, without feet - we find homicidal daffodils when we greet the opening chapters of Marvel's version of Day of the Triffids, as brought to us by Gerry Conway, John Wyndham and Ross Andru. Which is odd, as I always, for some reason, remember it as having been drawn by Rico Rival.

The alert reader will have noticed that Adam Warlock and this comic would appear to have now parted company.

The Defenders make their dynamic debut - with the help of a Neal Adams cover!

And it all happens because the Hulk, Sub-Mariner and Dr Strange must stop someone called Yandroth from destroying the Earth, with his deadly Omegatron!

Then, weirdness is afoot in the life of Daredevil, as he gets exposed to radiation and decides it'd be a blast to punch-in the head of Captain America at a charity boxing match.

Following that, we find our first-ever meeting with Psycho-Man in an adventure reprinted from Fantastic Four Annual #5. I remember reading part of this epic, on a coach, on the way to Blackpool and feeling it didn't seem to be up to the strip's usual standards.

Could it be? Could the Fantastic Four's golden age under Stan and Jack be coming to an end?

Poor old Silver Surfer. He spends all this time pining for Shalla-Bal and, then, when she finally grows some gumption and visits Earth, she finds him in the arms of another woman!

Meanwhile, the X-Men continue their run of encountering foes who can't be physically hurt. First, it was the Blob. Then, it was the Juggernaut. And, now, it's Unus the Untouchable!

After being attacked by a mutant-hating crowd, the Beast quits the X-Men and becomes a wrestler.

But, that leads to a meeting with a mutant who can't be touched.

And he's looking to join the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants!

Speak Your Brain! Part 105.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Image by Tumisu
from Pixabay

Can it be?

Can it be Tuesday?

And can it be the second half of a month?

Too gosh darn right it is.

And, as all dedicated followers of infamy know, that can only lead from one thing to another, and that other is the return of the greatest invention humanity has ever seen.

It's Speak Your Brain. The feature that's so good it says what it does on the tin!

Therefore, if you have a topic you've always wanted to get to the heart of, here's your chance to raise it and see just what the rest of us make of it all.

Personally, I often feel like I don't know what to make of it all.

But perhaps, with your help, that's about to change...

2000 AD - June 1987.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

It must have been a dilemma, knowing just what to see when you went to the cinema in June 1987.

That's because it was a month that saw the release of such memorable offerings as Harry and the Hendersons, The Untouchables, Predator, The Witches of Eastwick, Roxanne, Dragnet and Spaceballs.

Granted, not all those films were what could be called masterpieces - one or two of them might even be called not good, by a man less charitable than me - but they were, at least, memorable.

I shall, of course, nominate Predator as my Film of the Month because who doesn't like to see people being slaughtered by monsters in the woods?

When it came to music, June kicked off with Whitney Houston's I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me) at Number One on the UK singles chart, before that had to make way for the power and majesty of The Firm's Star Trekkin' which then had to subside before the pomp and bombast of the Pet Shop Boys' It's a Sin.

However, over on the accompanying album chart, the period was totally dominated by Whitney Houston, with her self-titled 2nd album managing to stay on top for the entire month.

And what of the Galaxy's Greatest Comic?

Shockingly, it was giving us Anderson PSI Division, Rogue Trooper, Judge Dredd and Strontium Dog.

But, just to shake things up a bit, it did also supply us with The Return of the Mean Team, D.R. & Quinch's Agony Page and a single-page Tales From Mega-City One.

July 19th, 1975 - Marvel UK, 50 years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

They always reckon that, in space, they can't hear you scream.

Who can't? And can you not text them?

Thankfully, there was no need for either screaming or texting in space, this week in 1975, because it was a month in which the American Apollo spacecraft and Soviet Soyuz spacecraft docked with each other in orbit, marking the first such link-up between spacecraft from the two nations. That meant the people on board could talk to each other, face to face, in a civilised manner that didn't involve either screaming or the use of thumbs.

And you know who was bound to be pleased by that?

The Bay City Rollers.

After all, it was the very week in which they were imploring us all to Give a Little Love in their song of that title, as it soared to Number One on the UK singles chart.

But also with outer space on their minds were Wings who reclaimed the pinnacle of the UK album rankings, thanks to their current release Venus and Mars.

It's a thrilling day for all British Marvel fans because Spidey's only gone and decided to travel to London in search of Gwen Stacy, in the hopes of convincing her to go back to New York with him!

Unfortunately, this brings the man we in Britain know as Spider-Geezer into conflict with a terrorist cell that's out to blow up Her Majesty's Big Ben!

Elsewhere, Iron Man muscles in on Batman's territory when he's dispatched to Vietnam to deal with mad scientist Half-Face. As far as I can recall, he turns out not to be mad at all.

But there's much bigger trouble in store for Thor when Tana Nile asks him to visit Rigel to beat up Galactus who's in danger of eating everything in her galaxy.

Good God above! That cover promises us more action than the human mind can possibly even hope to dream of hoping to manage to accommodate, as the newly-merged mag flings everything it can at us!

It kicks off with the Swordsman smashing through a billboard, on his way to fight Clint Barton in a bid to prove, once and for all, that he's his former apprentice's superior.

Except he isn't.

Because he's the Swordsman.

And he's nobody's superior.

Not even his apprentice.

Conan's still involved in the siege of Makkalet and I do suspect it's the issue in which he has to fight a bunch of skeletons in helmets.

And Dr Strange, meanwhile, is in a seaside town that worships a god called Sligguth.

And he soon discovers his magic doesn't work properly there!

The Hulk's well and truly back in Jarella Land, where he quickly rescues his girlfriend and leads her subjects to revolt against the evil Visis.

However, the villain's got one last trick up his sleeve - the ability to create another Hulk!

One that's stupid!

And therefore has a big advantage over a clever Hulk!

Elsewhere, the Jester gets himself hired by Richard Raleigh to take out his rival for the job of District Attorney - Foggy Nelson.

And the Fantastic Four go to The Beehive where Him's cocoon finally opens to reveal he in all his's declamatory glory.

Given the total lack of fighting skills, tactical nous, and intelligence of Jack Russell's hairy alter-ego, it's hard to see how a fight between him and Dracula could be anything other than a one-sided smackdown but, nonetheless, that tussle reaches its second issue.

And it does so with Jack discovering that Dracula killed one of his ancestors!

Meanwhile, Frankenstein's Monster is hanging around with a robot and getting increasingly frustrated by its inability to tell him just who he really is.

It's always a moment of excitement when Marvel UK decides to reprint one of the painted US Planet of the Apes covers instead of commissioning a new one. This one's by Earl Norem, I do believe.

Inside, Brent and Nova explore a tunnel which leads them to a huge cavern containing what seems to be a dead city!

On another world entirely, Adam Warlock finally manages to bump off the terror of Triax.

And I do believe the Counter-Earth version of Dr Doom puts in an appearance.

I do believe Norrin wraps up his battle with the Overlord but it means he must return to Earth and be stuck there again.

And the X-Men and Human Torch are still trying to stop the Juggernaut, even though everyone knows that no one can stop the Juggernaut!

Atlas/Seaboard July 1975.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Hold on to your hats, literature lovers, because there's a whole mountain range of comics from Atlas to get through, this month.

With such activity, we can only assume the company's going from strength to strength.

Or is it?

Atlas heroes are not always famed for their staying power but Wulf the Barbarian's no quitter. Unlike some others, he's made it to his third issue and is still battling strong.

This time, he has a run-in with some rat-men and I seem to recall he encounters a sort of techno-mage blessed with a big industrial complex, or something. Is there a vague Wizard of Oz analogy-thing also going on with it all?

There you go. Proof positive that people can never accuse me of being vague about things.

Publisher Martin Goodman once famously told Stan Lee that people wouldn't buy a comic about someone with spider-powers.

And it seems he was right because, after just three missions, the Tarantula finds his adventures coming to a premature end.

But what a way to go, with something or other happening that involves living gargoyles!

But you know who else comes a cropper this month?

None other than John Targitt himself!

And even a new costume and the appearance of all-time great super-villain Professor Death can't save his book from the curse of cancellation!

And yet another Atlas title hits the buffers.

And does so just as it introduces sensational new super-doer the Man-Monster.

I can shed little light on the Man-Monster, as I've never read this one but I do know he's a former champion swimmer and that the villain of the piece is called Hell-Blazer.

But fans of series, "regular," the Bog Beast need not despair. Despite the arrival of that new character, the Bog Beast gets one last outing when, in this issue's back-up strip, he discovers There's a Vampire Killer Still at Large!

Can the Scorpion buck the trend and survive and thrive where others are stung?

No, he can't.

Despite getting a brand new costume and being transplanted from the 1930s to the 1970s, he too comes crashing to an early demise with his third issue.

But how is it possible that he's failed when he's up against villainy as profound as that of the Golden Fuhrer who I'm sure bears no resemblance at all to Marvel's Red Skull.

Is the dedicated Atlas fan to be downhearted by all these cancellations?

No, he isn't - because he's still got Sgt Stryker and his Death Squad to keep his spirits up!

If this wasn't also their final issue.

In this month's thrilling excursion, we encounter Kill Rommel and Dead-Man's Ridge! brought to us by Archie Goodwin, Al McWilliams, and Jack Sparling.

Anybody want to bet any money on whether this will be the final issue of Planet of the Vampires?

I think we can all guess that it shall.

My knowledge of this month's tale is especially clueless but I do know it's called The Blood Plague! and comes from the brains, pencils and typewriters of John Albano and Russ Heath.

And now we encounter Atlas' most radical response yet to the failure of almost all its books.

And that's to kill a central character!

It's true. It's clearly been decided by someone in authority that a child-murdering tree isn't the best lead for a comic. And, so, he's bumped off this issue, with the plan being for him to be replaced in the book by The Midnight Men.

Sadly, that plan won't work and the comic will never be seen again.

And nor will the Midnight Men!

Apart from all that, the most intriguing aspect of this issue is it's drawn by Steve Ditko but inked by Bernie Wrightson which is a combination that should be enough to get any comic flying off the shelves.

The internet informs me that 260,000 copies of this issue were printed, with 15,000 of them for sale in Britain. This would appear to be a typical print-run for the company and its books.

But at least we can rely on Ironjaw to not go down like a sack of potatoes.

And he hasn't. He's managed to make it to his fourth issue!

Which will be his last.

It appears that, before he goes, we encounter the origin of our, "hero," who I vaguely recall having been some sort of happy-go-lucky, chilled-out peacenik entertainer who loses his jaw and turns into a psychotic thug.

It seems that even Satan can't stop the Grim Ghost's newest foe!

Having said that, the villain is dead by the end of the tale. So, he can't be that tough.

Elsewhere, Satan increases the Grim Ghost's powers, but that won't be enough to save him from his real enemy, which is public apathy. Sadly, this will prove to be Grimmy's final issue.

But all these people getting their comics cancelled after just three issues are slackers.

The Cougar manages to get his scrapped after only two!

It's true, the Hollywood stuntman turned mediocre crime-fighter has a run-in with a werewolf - who's killing everyone the Cougar knows - before ascending to the Great Stuntman Social Club in the Sky.

It's hard not to warm to the Brute, a simple soul who just wants to be left alone to eat human flesh, but even that isn't enough to save him and he too hits his final issue this month.

In this sensational thriller, our protagonist is captured by the police but escapes.

However, in another location, mad scientist Rolf Hendrick unleashes his cyborg Doomstalker upon the world!

But forget the Cougar's failure after just two issues, because Blazing Battle Tales has a gauntlet of its own that it wants to throw down - by getting cancelled after just one!

In it, Sgt Hawk encounters The One-Armed Beast  -which doesn't sound very scary. I'd be far more worried about the danger it poses if it had two of them.

That's followed by The Sky Demon in The Sky Demon!

And that's followed by Private William Swanson in The Bronze Star Winner.

The Marvel Lucky Bag - July 1985.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

It's July 1985 and, by an incredible coincidence, in my pocket, I have however much money it is that it costs to buy a cinema ticket in July 1985.

But what to spend it on?

That's the dilemma.

A dilemma that could tear a man's mind apart.

And just one look at what films were released that month makes it clear just why I'll be lucky to emerge with sanity intact.

After all, it was a month that unleashed such titans of entertainment as Back to the Future, The Emerald Forest, Red Sonja, Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, Silverado, Day of the Dead, Wetherby, Kiss of the Spider Woman and National Lampoon's European Vacation.

I'm sure those are all magnificent offerings but it goes without saying that the film released, that July, which I most want to see is something that goes by the name of Dr. Otto and the Riddle of the Gloom Beam. I have no idea what that is but the title alone is telling at me that viewing it is a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

I don't mention Savage Sword of Conan much in this feature but Stephen Hickman's cover has prompted me to break that habit.

This month's main story seems to be a mammoth 50-pager from Larry Hama and Rudy Nebres in which a trip to the Pictish wilderness sees Conan encounter a healer and a child who can help him rediscover lost memories.

There's also a 10-page backup in which the barbarian encounters a kingdom whose border can't be crossed without the payment of a sadistic toll.

Yet another striking Sienkiewicz cover heralds the return of the New Mutants.

Not that they ever left us.

Regardless, Sunspot and Magma are kidnapped, leading to Cannonball and Magik setting out to find them.

But the Dazzler soon discovers they've been captured for use in an underground mutant arena!

Despite his return to Earth, the Thing's comic is still going strong and visually referencing that Steve Ditko sequence in which Spidey had to lift a big thing with water dripping around him.

Inside, it's great news for all lovers of leprechauns - as The Thing is granted three wishes by them!

I'm going to assume it leads to all sorts of trouble for our hero and those around him.

And I'm going to guess, using my vast intellect and powers of observation, that Doctor Octopus may put in an appearance, this month.

Apparently, his arms are determined to break him out of prison.

Apparently, Spider-Man is out to stop them.

It's one I've picked for the elegance and simplicity of its cover.

When it comes to what happens inside it, Bill Mantlo and Butch Guice weave a thriller in which someone called Domino puts a stop to a mutiny by someone called Logic.

Also, someone called Admiral J'Rel attempts to conceal and protect someone called Pamela and Jim Drake.

But that's not all - because his daughter Raider is in jail and awaiting execution!

I'm going to guess that's her on the cover.

The name of the rat is, as yet, unknown to me.

It only seems like five minutes since the first Secret Wars ended - and here they are again, already having another one.

Anyway, it seems that, this time, the Beyonder shows up on Earth, in search of knowledge and experience.

Needless to say, this sends the planet's heroes rushing to action stations.

Rushing to such a degree that they leap into action against someone called Thundersword, who they think is the Beyonder but isn't.

I can only hope Thundersword sues them.

What on Earth's happening now?

We're getting a story called The Big Sleep, written and drawn by Rick Veitch.

Apart from that, I can reveal nothing of this mag or of its contents, other than to declare that it will run for six issues.

Who's this getting a brand new book of his own?

It's Dreadstar!

Except. as that cover might hint, it's not that brand new.

In fact, it's a reprint from 1982's Dreadstar #1 in which Oedi's origin is recapped, as Dreadstar and his gang set out to steal a big satellite.

Someone at Marvel continues to love Cloak and Dagger. And so it is that they get a brand new comic!

As far as I can make out, this month, our tortured thwarters of depravity take down a porn shop that's employing slave labour.

On top of even that, Dagger decides to visit her birth mother, after receiving information about something or other from someone called Father Delgado.

July 12th, 1975 - Marvel UK, 50 years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Has any man ever been drowned by a water bed?

More to the point, has any man ever been drowned by a pillow?

If there's one man who has, it's probably Johnny Nash.

That's because no man's pillow is more drenched in tears than his.

You guessed it, this is my way of building up to announcing that, this week in 1975, the man himself hit the top of the UK singles chart, thanks to his smash hit Tears On My Pillow.

Over on the parallel album chart, top spot was retained by none other than the Carpenters and their platter that shattered; Horizon.

Tears On My Pillow is an appealing song but there were other tracks I also approved of on that week's UK Hit Parade. Among them were:

Misty - Ray Stevens

I'm Not in Love - 10cc

Give a Little Love - the Bay City Rollers

Whispering Grass - Windsor Davies and Don Estelle

Listen to What the Man Said - Wings

and

Someone Saved My Life Tonight - Elton John.

Should one wish to peruse the matter in greater depth, that UK singles chart can be found here.

While the adjacent LP rankings dwell herewithin.

Now what's Spidey supposed to do? While he's been pining over Gwen Stacy, the Beetle's only gone and kidnapped Aunt May!

I suggest that what he can do is fling the villain into a swimming pool and hope Aunt May doesn't decide to get engaged to him.

Meanwhile, Tony Stark has plenty to worry about, as well, because the Crusher intends to live up to his name when it comes to how he deals with Iron Man.

Not only that but Happy and Pepper have decided to get married!

To each other!

And I do believe this may be the issue in which Don Blake discovers he never existed and Odin just made him up, to teach Thor a lesson!

Can it be true?

Yes it can!

Because you The Reader demanded it, Conan's book's been cancelled!

And merged with The Avengers!

Granted, that might not be quite what's happened but I'm sure that's how it'll be marketed by a cunning editor.

Needless to say, as someone who never got his hands on a single issue of the weekly Conan comic, this is good news for 11-year-old-me, as it means I can now get a weekly fix of Barry Smith's artwork, on top of all the other treasures this publication can offer.

And the issue kicks off in fine style with Conan on a ship, prepping for the siege of Makkalet in which a bid shall be made to steal back the Living Tarim from its denizens.

Elsewhere, the Avengers are in space, with gangster Barney Barton, looking to bring the knuckles of justice to the faces of Egghead, the Mad Thinker and Puppet Master. One of these characters will be dead by the end of this tale.

And I think we can guess which one.

Even more elsewhere, Shang-Chi's sister's trying to get her brother to join forces with her in her vendetta against their father.

Needless to say, our hero's having none of it.

Its all great stuff, of course but I suppose we should stop to reflect upon the fact that it's the first time Marvel UK's suffered the indignity of having to merge two comics because of poor sales.

Could it be that dark clouds are beginning to lurk upon the horizon?

"Don't count on it, Baldy!"? Are they sure the Hulk now has the mind of Bruce Banner? I don't recall the scientist ever talking like that.

I do, however, believe this signals the not-so-brutish brute is back in the land of Jarella and, possibly, heading for a showdown with himself.

Alicia's finally got to meet the cocoon that contains a being so awesome he can only be referred to as Him!

And the Fantastic Four are finally on the way to doing something about it.

And it's bad news for us all when a brand new villain enters the life of Daredevil

And that villain's called the Jester.

And his main weapon is a yo-yo.

And he bears no spiritual resemblance at all to any villains Batman may have ever encountered.

It's the clash that had to happen, when the lord of vampires meets Marvel's premier werewolf!

And all sorts of stuff's going off in the strip that belongs to Frankenstein's Monster but I don't know just what.

I do know, though, that it involves the criminal organisation ICON and a big robot called the Berserker!

Despite what that cover claims, this is an issue in which Brent manages to flee Ape City, not one in which he forces his way into it

It's also the instalment in which he finally discovers he's still on Earth, thanks to finding himself in the underground ruins of somewhere famous in New York that featured in Hello Dolly.

On the same planet but in the distant past, Sinbad finally completes his mission to defeat Tom Baker and restore a Vizier to full facial health. 

Adam Warlock, meanwhile, is still battling the evil New-Man Apollo who's now revealed himself to be a giant, talking warthog!

A beautiful but curiously undramatic John Buscema cover greets us and I believe it heralds the tale in which the Surfer finally manages to find a way through Galactus' space barrier...

...only to discover he's in the future and the universe has been completely ravaged by a charmer called The Overlord.

Following that, the X-Men have a scrap on their hands when their mansion is invaded by the Juggernaut!

Faced with a crisis like this, it seems they're going to need help from the Human Torch!