Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon.
***
Even as I type these words, The Incredible Shrinking Man is on The Horror Channel. And that sounds, to me, like fate's demanding I take a new look at Marvel's very own incredible shrinking man; Henry Pym.
Dr Pym, famously, went on to become Ant-Man and Yellowjacket and Goliath and God knows who else but, before all those costumed caperings, he was just a scientist in search of a great invention.
And in Tales to Astonish #27, he found one.
Or did he?
We begin with him testing out his latest and greatest invention, a potion that makes things shrink, just by touching them. Why it doesn't make the test tube it's contained within shrink isn't explained.
Unless it started out as a really gigantic test tube.
Regardless, the man who's determined to prove the scientific establishment wrong in mocking his wild ideas decides it's time to test the potion on himself.
He, of course, responds to this triumph as any man would - by running out into his garden where he's promptly attacked by ants.
Showing the sort of smarts only a man of science can possess, he decides to escape them by hiding in their own ant hill. After all, what are the chances of them ever looking in there for him?
Almost disastrously, he falls into the ants' honey store where it seems he'll be stuck until he dies but, as luck would have it, he's rescued by the one friendly ant in the colony.
But, once more, luck is with him, as he spots a discarded match and lights it. In the ensuing fiery chaos, he flees the nest.
But how can he get back to where his growth serum resides, before the ants regain their composure and catch up with him?
Very easily, it turns out. For that friendly ant comes to the rescue, once more, and gives him a lift to his house's window sill where the serum's lying.
Now returned to normal size, Henry pours his shrinking and growing potions down the sink and vows never again to mess about with the awesome power of size-changing.
And he resolves that he'll also never forget that friendly ant who saved him.
It's certainly a valuable life lesson for us all, but certain things leap to my mind.
The obvious one is that we all know Hank Pym later goes on to have several mental meltdowns but, to be honest, he seems to have started his career with one.
Even in his first panel, he's drawn as a man unhinged. The fact that he leaves his growth serum in a place where his shrunken self can't possibly reach it, and that his response to rapid diminution is to rush straight out of the house, for no good reason, also suggests he's not exactly operating with a full deck.
Also, never trust a scientist who's out to prove the world wrong for laughing at him.
Other things strike me. One is that, in this tale, his serum shrinks anything it touches, rather than having to be drunk. And it works on the inanimate as well as the animate, meaning even chairs aren't safe from its powers. Is this tale the only time that's ever been the case?
Also, page 3 contains a panel in which Pym contemplates that he'll be able to shrink a vast army to the size of insects, so they can all fit in one plane, in a scene almost identical to the one in Fantastic Four #7 where Reed Richards shrinks the entire population of Planet X (apart from Kurrgo) to the size of insects, so they can all fit into one spaceship. Interesting that this tale preceded that one by nine months and that Lee and Kirby were not exactly reluctant to recycle ideas.
Anyway, it's a short and breezy tale that makes little sense at all and depends on Pym enjoying incredible strokes of fortune in order to survive - as well as displaying incredible levels of stupidity, in order to be imperilled in the first place.
Still, despite all that, I can't help feeling Henry's been very hard done by; in that, somehow, by some cruel twist of fate, he was nowhere to be seen in the pages of Origins of Marvel Comics.
There he was, having arthropodal adventures, months before Spider-Man was thrust upon the world and, yet, if you believed that book, he ever even existed.
Good God above, with treatment like that, no wonder the poor man went mad.
And there's one thing I haven't even mentioned.
At one point in this tale, he defeats an ant by using his superior judo skills on it.
I mean, come on, if defeating ants at judo doesn't get a man into Origins of Marvel Comics, what will?
29 comments:
Steve, at al.
Please be kind to ants! (and aunts!)
As I type there are literally millions (billions) of them at war underneath some sidewalk or something in Southern California and they have been for years. Every second of every minute of every day... two tribes engaged in a battle for the ant supremacy of the Americas.
When I saw the youtube / science show I thought about moving to the UK! I did find an article...
https://www.californiasun.co/stories/as-many-as-30-million-ants-die-each-year-in-a-war-between-two-california-ant-colonies/
Ants & martial arts have history!
In the Kung Fu episode, 'The Passion of Chen Yi', in their youths Kwai Chang Caine's enemy, Chen Yi, gives Caine a mocking gift (a bit like the Dauphin's tennis balls, in 'Henry V'), in the form of a large wooden model of a pismire (an ant). Chen Yi then excuses this thinly veiled insult, in the guise of a gift, by pretending he thought Master Po's nickname for Caine is 'Pismire' (of course, in reality, it's 'Grasshopper')
When Caine refuses to accept this supposed 'gift'(the ant), Chen Yi challenges Caine to combat, and if Caine loses, he has to accept the insult of Chen Yi's mocking gift. At that point in their lives, Chen Yi is the superior fighter. Thus, Caine loses the fight, and is forced to accept the large wooden ant, which Chen Yi made for him.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRGubK0mRIY
When Kwai Chang meets Chen Yi again, years later, Caine's combat skills have improved considerably - and he is not so easily provoked by insults, either.
Phillip
Steve:
As big a Lee/Kirby Fan / Marvel Zombie as I am, i don’t think I’ve ever actually read that first Hank Pam story. Which is crazy. Your (hilarious as usual) synopsis makes it sound pretty kooky and logic-defying, which, if we’re being entirely honest, makes it no different than the vast majority of Stan and Jack’s Sci- Fi / Monster stories of the same vintage.
I think the reason I’ve never bothered to read it is simply down to my antipathy toward ants. I mean, I’m not into insects as a general rule, but ants aren’t even ‘Creepy Cool’, like spiders, just plain ‘creepy’, period.
Pym has never been one of my favorite Marvel heroes, in any of his various incarnations. I think he and Jan work fine as part of the overall Avengers ensemble — and Kirby’s original Ant Man costume design has grown on me (no pun intended) over the years. The helmet is especially neat.
In solo stories, ehhh. I did kinda/sorta like the Mike Friedrich / Herb Trimpe series in MARVEL FEATURE, which was very ‘Incredible Shrinking Man’ -ish. But that ‘Oh No I’m Stuck At This Size’ schtick is obviously not terribly sustainable for long. Kinda hard for full-size humans to interact with him.
I do also enjoy the Marvel Movie version of the character. When I first heard they were making an Ant Man movie I thought they’d lost their minds. Happy to admit I was wrong.
b.t.
Surely Pym's sink and drains would shrink when he poured the potion away?
Well Dave (and Steve) my theory on the potion is that it actually worked on Hank Pym's head, and his powers were mental. That's why later one pill made him larger, and the other made small (hey, it was the 60s man).
Which also explains his strange behaviour after regular use...
-sean
Yep, all that size-changing broke his brain.
If I was shrinking, it's definitely spiders I would be worried about. For its time that scene in The Incredible Shrinking Man was pretty gosh-darn horrifying. It looks kinda hokey today, I guess. But that scene from The Fly (the first one) still gives me the willies.
Spiders are the Tyrannosuauruses of the bug world. But I would rather be eaten by one of those than a giant spider.
Even though spiders this far north are small and harmless (which is how we like our spiders to be), and they're not gonna drop off a banana tree and bite your face, they are still suspect.
It's like an alien form of life.
M.P.
Dave, that was the one point in the tale where Hank showed any sense, because he poured his growth and shrinking serums into the sink at the same time, so they would have cancelled each other out.
Sean and MP, what if you're right? What if the entire Marvel Universe only exists in Hank's head, thanks to his massive amounts of substance abuse?
Bt, I've always loved Ant-Man's costume. I think it was that which convinced me he was a credible hero when I first encountered him. Tragically, I later realised he was a terrible hero.
Charlie, thanks for that link. I remember that, round these parts, about 40 years ago, there was a big local media panic about Pharaoh Ants and how they were going to destroy the city. Four decades later, the city appears to still be standing.
Phillip. if I were a martial artist, I'm not sure if I'd rather be compared to an ant or a grasshopper. Obviously, I'd most want to be compared to a mantis. But not the one from The Avengers
Fun fact: in sci-fi films like THEM! ants grow to giant size but if that really happened the ants would be crushed by the weight of their own exo-skeletons.
All you Marvel Historians out there... Help???
IIRC - this is NOT considered Ant Man's first appearance is it? It's one of those stories that is considered non-canonical?
I seem to recall there is a similar situation with The Hulk? Some type of Hulk creature appeared a few years before Banner had to save puny (and stupid) human Rick Jones? (Yes - that is a shot at Killdumpster! LOL!)
I mean, it's kind of like listening to Pink Floyd's "Meddle" etc. and you can hear all kinds of composures that would eventually be in "Dark Side of the Moon" a few years later. But... they ain't Dark Side of the Moon.
Charlie:
Well, I think it’s different than the Hulk situation. The original ‘Hulk’ from JOURNEY INTO MYSTERY #62 was a big furry alien named Xemnu — clearly not Ol’ Jade Jaws. The ESSENTIAL ANT-MAN phonebook starts with ‘The Man in the Ant Hill!’ from ASTONISH #27, followed by ‘The Return of the Ant-Man!’ from ASTONISH #35, eight issues later. Hank Pym is the lead character in both stories. Seems to me like this one IS actually ‘officially’ canon.
But ‘Official Canon’ is a tricky business. There is one school of thought that says EVERY comic ever published by Timely-Atlas-Marvel is Canon. Which is why we got things like the return of the Commie-crushin’ Replacement Captain America in the 70s to explain how he could have been active in the 50s when everyone knows he was floating around in an iceberg since WWII, and a four-issue Silver Surfer mini-series to explain how Surfy could have been present at Mar-Vell’s funeral on Titan when Galactus’ ‘Stuck on Earth’ barrier was still in place. Which just seems silly and extreme to me. I mean, isn’t that what No Prizes are for?
b.t.
Colin, thanks to their lack of lungs, they also wouldn't be able to breathe, at that size.
And then there's also the square-cube law, Steve.
-sean
B.T. it's funny you mention that issue of Cap which should be popping up here "50 years ago" in less than a year!
In Charlie's mind that was one of the most important comic of the last 50 years in the MCU? I mean the notion of the multiple Caps and Bucky's eventually leading to "The Winter Soldier" series and movies seem to start with this issue?
Also, the reprinting of the 50s Cap - Red Skull stuff blew my 12 year old mind!
Steve - Wednesday is 2-2-22, a rather unusual date for our lifetimes. Do you have anything special planned for us?
Isn't that more of a problem for warm-blooded creatures, Sean?
Come to think of it, are ants warm-blooded or are they cold-blooded?
I can't say I do have anything special lined up, Charlie.
I think quarter-power scaling would make it more of a problem for warm blooded creatures Steve, but the ratio between volume and surface area thing would still apply to insects, surely?
How's that? Did I manage to bluff my way through it ok?
-sean
As regards surface area to volume ratio, wouldn't the ants stay warmer, if they grew massive?
After all, a plate of chips goes cold more quickly than a baked potato of the same volume, as more surface area is exposed.
I'm not sure as regards ants, though - after all, my brother was the science guy, not me!
Phillip
I was listening to this thing on NPR, there was this old scientist who figured out how ants communicate. This all happened a long time ago. Anyway, this old science dude, who sounded like he oughtta be in that old Thomas Dolby video, figured out that ants communicate with chemicals. Leaving chemical trails and such.
One way he demonstrated it was by figuring out what kind of chemicals a dead, decaying ant gives off. Then he sprayed them chemicals on a live ant.
See, when an ant dies, the other ants drag him off and throw him on the rubbish pile. They can smell it on 'im, I guess. What happens to the corpse after that I dunno. Maybe they eat him, I can't say.
Anyway, these ants picked up this chemical of decay on this live ant that got sprayed, and drug him off to the corpse-pile, no matter how loud he hollered, "I'm still alive you assholes!"
Okay, that part about the hollering, I made that up. But that then ant gets up off the pile, dusts himself off and goes back to work.
They KEEP throwing his ass on that pile, and he keeps getting back up. Possibly looking for a rubber tree plant, I dunno. (there was this song about...oh never mind)
This goes on till that chemical scent wears off. Then the ant goes into therapy.
That guy did have a bit of the mad scientist gene in him, I guess.
I'm sure I had a point when I started this comment, but I think I've misplaced it somewheres.
Apologies.
M.P.
It hadn't occurred to me that tomorrow is 2-2-22 but I do know that February 2nd is Candlemas Day which is the final, FINAL day of the Christmas season - yes, it's still officially the festive season until tomorrow so may I wish a MERRY CHRISTMAS to all readers of Steve Does Comics!
See, I KNEW there was a reason to not take out Xmas tree and lights down yet….
b.t.
Is Candlemas one of them weird old pagan deals the Catholic church co-opted? Another occasion for you people to pop a cork? How &@$#ing long does the official Christmas season gotta be?!
M.P.
I was speaking in jest, there.
M.P.:)
Don't you lot know anything? 1st Feb is Imbolc, the halfway point from solstice to equinox - it's actually the first day of spring.
Seasons greetings Steve, and everyone else. Except DW; no offence to mate, but it must be Lughnasadh down under (feel free to sacrifice a bull and dance on a hilltop).
M.P., Imbolc was so-opted by early Romano-Briton Christian imperialists as St Brigid's Day.
-sean
*no offence mate
Sorry about the poor edit. Duh
-sean
Candlemas Day is the 40th day of the Christmas season. The number 40 seems important in Judaeo-Christianity:
40 days in the Christmas season
40 days in Lent
It rained for 40 days and 40 nights in Noah's flood
The Hebrews wandered for 40 years after the exodus from Egypt
Jesus spent 40 days in the wilderness
The word 'quarantine' must originate in 40 days, too, I suppose.
According to Look North, it's also the Chinese New Year.
Phillip
Chinese New Year occurs on the new moon, so it's not always on the 1st Feb Philip.
Er, not that you claimed it was.
-sean
2-2-22 is fast upon us!
Be careful! If you miss it you will have to wait 11 years, 1 month, and 1 day for 3-3-33!
By then Steve could have a "70 years ago" today column!
The Chinese new year is a lunar festival which can occur anytime between January 20th and February 20th.
My birthday is on February 17th so it sometimes coincides with Chinese New Year.
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