Fifty years ago today - March 1973.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Another month is here to grab us in its claws and drag us backwards, backwards, ever backwards to the 1970s.

Barry Smith departs the strip - and does it with panache, as our intrepid pair of rogues climb up a tower, try to steal a magic tiara and end up having to fight a giant snake.

In other words, it's just a normal night, by their standards.

I don't know what happens in this issue but I'm assuming it's the one in which Captain America gets super-strength.

Also, judging by that cover, it seems to be the one where he takes up rampant arrogance as his new hobby.

Now it's trouble for Daredevil and the Black Widow because a street performer turns into the Dark Messiah, breaks a gang of kids out of prison, takes them to the local park and erects a force field around them.

Rather more pressingly, am I the only one who gets the Dark Messiah and Angar the Screamer mixed up with each other?

Then again, am I wrong to do that? Now, I'm starting to worry that they're the same character.

Hooray! The Hulk takes a trip to Canada!

And then finds himself having to tackle the Mimic who's unknowingly draining his life force.

He also has to contend with the somewhat lesser threat of the Beast in the only issue of our hero's US mag that I ever owned.

We're in the land of the Inhumans - and Omega's up to no good!

Having said that, isn't he trying to liberate the Alpha Primitives from slavery?

That doesn't sound that bad a thing to do.

Either way, it's another cover which features Jim Steranko channeling his inner Rich Buckler.

I detect the handiwork of Jim Starlin on that cover.

I also detect that I know nothing of this comic's contents, other than that it features the terror of Fangor.

Not to mention Rasputin.

Blinky blonky blimey, guv'nor. That blooming yank thunder god's shown his boat race in good old Blighty and found himself up against a bally druid wot never ages.

That'd be Ken Barlow then.

And he didn't even have time to finish his jellied eels and stand round the old pub joanna for a sing-song.

I like to feel that perfectly captures the speech patterns of all Britishers who appear in this tale.

This is the one where Hawkeye proves his smarts by quitting the Avengers and helping a super-villain become all but unbeatable.

That villain is Imus Champion who's a big lad with plenty of money and will be played by Brian Blessed if they ever put him in a movie.

The Distruptor's still showing he doesn't get democracy, as New York's mayoral campaign rumbles on.

I suspect this may be the issue in which Richard Raleigh dies - following the shock revelation that he's the villain of the piece.

That's Marvel's brawly battlers accounted for.

But what of the Distinguished Competition?

What were its characters up to in the books that also bore a March cover date?

To be honest, as I peruse the Spinner Rack of Nostalgia, not too much from the month catches my eye but the following four are, perhaps, of interest to the connoisseur.

Following the departure of Supergirl, Adventure Comics has no permanent star. And, so, it gives us not one but three tales.

The first is called The Adventurers' Club and is a story I know little of.

That's followed by Snow-White Death! starring the Vigilante.

And we finish off with a Captain Fear episode titled God of Vengeance.

Hold on to your stetsons, cowboys, because a brand new Wild West comic hits our eyeballs, blazing away like a loaded six-gun.

Admittedly, it's not that brand new, as all three tales in it are reprinted from the 1940s and 1950s.

I'm aware the Kinks recorded a track called Johnny Thunder in the 1960s. I don't know if this character was the inspiration for it.

Hooray! Secret Oranges arrives!

And it does so in style, giving us the beginnings of Superman, Batman and the Flash!

Rather disappointingly, though, the origins of Superman and Batman are only granted a couple of pages each, with the vast bulk of the book devoted to the Flash and Hawkman.

And I'm not even convinced the Hawkman story features his origin.

And yet another new comic appears, to separate us from our twenty cents.

Lesser magazines give us sword and sorcery but this one gives us a sword of sorcery as Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser escape from the pages of Wonder Woman and set about obtaining a magical mask for the wizards Sheelba and Ningauble.

I've no idea who those two are but I'm sure it's fab.

The rest of the world may not be quite so convinced, as this title will run for just five issues before cancellation.

March 3rd, 1973 - Marvel UK, 50 years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

BABY BABY BAY-BEH!!!

Those three words can only mean one thing.

That, this week in 1973, a veritable wall of attitude greeted followers of the UK singles chart, as Slade's Cum On Feel the Noize smashed straight in at Number One, giving the lads from Wolverhampton their fourth British chart-topper. It was also the first single to enter at Number One since the Beatles' Get Back in 1969.

On the associated album chart, however, there was no change at the pinnacle, as Elton John's Don't Shoot Me I'm Only the Piano Player retained its stranglehold on the upper reaches.

As you can probably guess from that cover, the Leader's out to get the Hulk.

Rather more concerningly for our hero, convinced that Bruce Banner's a traitor, Glenn Talbot orders his men to use deadly force on the scientist, and Bruce is promptly shot in the head.

Meanwhile, Daredevil must take on the shocking menace of Electro in a tale pencilled by Joe Orlando. Given his strong links with DC, it always seems strange to think of Orlando working for Marvel.

Even more strangely, I do believe DD turns out to be capable of piloting a space rocket, thanks to his super-senses.

And, speaking of things strange and spacey, the Fantastic Four must find a way to overcome the infuriating implausibilities of the Impossible Man.

Well, this can't be a promising development. Betty Brant's brother's gotten himself a whole heap of gambling debts and because of that, she's forced to help Doc Ock!

In Thor's strip, matters of great significance are also occurring, as the thunder god has his first-ever encounter with Loki.

At least, it's the first one we've ever seen.

Because it turns out he's had plenty of others in the past.

Even though we've been told, just two stories ago, that he's not the real Thor. He's Don Blake with Thor's powers.

How can any of this make sense?

It can't.

We're just going to have to wait for Stan and Jack to come up with an explanation for it all.

But who cares about that? What we care about is that, this issue, we get yet another free gift!

But what is it?

It's a coupon.

A coupon for what?

I don't have a clue.

But it has Spider-Man's face on it.

Speak Your Brain! Part 48. Everyone's a Winner!

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Image by Tumisu
from Pixabay

Yet again, a month draws to a close.

But it was no ordinary month.

For a start, it contained not one but three special occasions.

Those occasions were Valentine's Day, Pancake Day and the opening of a new Lidl in the centre of Sheffield, next to Poundland, just up the road from the other Poundland.

And they say high street shopping is dead.

But what of you? Are those the subjects of which you wish to speak?

Or is there an even more urgent matter tugging at your tongue?

If so, here's the chance to say so because we've reached the latest installment of the greatest series of them all. The one in which the first person to comment gets to decide the topic of the day.

What will it be?

Only time - and the comments section - will tell.

Will Tell?

If I were a man of wit and intelligence, I'd now work out a way to end this post with a quip that relates to shooting apples off people's heads, and skillfully tying it into the fundamental concept of Speak Your Brain.

But I can't think of one.

So, I won't.

2000 AD - January 1985.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

There's only one reason you're reading this post.

And that's because it has a domain name which enables you to actually find it.

And, for that, this post can thank the month of January 1985.

Verily, it be true. In that very month, the internet's Domain Name System was created - and things would never be the same again.

But, away from such futuristic fare, January saw a project that some may have feared was lagging behind the times a little, as the charity single We Are the World was being recorded by USA for Africa, making it far too late for that all-important Christmas market. Then again, maybe it was merely spectacularly early for the next Christmas market.

No such tardiness on the UK singles chart where, thanks to it being mere days after the Festive Season, the month kicked off with Band Aid's Do They Know It's Christmas? in top spot. But, inevitably, with Yuletide gone, it soon had to relinquish its crown. And it did so to Foreigner's I Want to Know What Love Is.

Love is, of course, a failure to score in tennis. I'm surprised a band of their resources and clout didn't have any means of discovering that.

Over on the British album chart, the month began with Various Artists' The Hits Album sitting pretty before forced to move aside for Alison Moyet's Alf which then, itself, gave way to Foreigner's Agent Provocateur. 

That was all delightful. But what of the galaxy's greatest comic?

It was still giving us the familiar diet of Rogue Trooper, Tharg's Future-Shocks, Nemesis the Warlock, Judge Dredd, The Stainless Steel Rat, The Hell Trekkers and Ace Trucking Co.

However, there was one new element, thanks to the addition of the 2000 AD 1985 Calendar, Parts 1&2.

Interesting to see Prog 400's cover giving us a tribute to Roy Lichtenstein.

Or perhaps it was a tribute to whichever artist Roy'd borrowed the image from. Who can know? Not me, I'm a Philistine.

February 24th, 1973 - Marvel UK, 50 years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Holy smokes, what magnificence is Marvel UK going to fling at us, this week?

It really is no fun being Bruce Banner. No sooner is the Gamma-soaked brainbox back from his jaunt to Asia than he's jailed as a traitor.

Still, not to worry, as the President - knowing his secret, thanks to Rick "Blabbermouth" Jones - sets him free.

Not that he's at liberty for long, because that's when the Leader's army of Humanoids promptly captures him.

Back in New York, the origin of Daredevil continues apace. This time, getting a whole 10 pages devoted to it.

And, in another part of New York, Doctor Doom manages to convince the rest of the Fantastic Four that he's Mr Fantastic.

Then again, Alicia Masters managed to convince the rest of the Fantastic Four that she was Sue Storm.

They really aren't very good at recognising their own friends, are they?

I do believe it's the debut of the deadliest team of villains ever to set foot in a comic book.

That's right. The Enforcers are in town and, apparently, they're out to shake down Betty Brant.

Not that I know just what's meant by the phrase, "Shake down Betty Brant." It's just a plot description for the story, that I got from the internet.

But, whatever it all means, it would seem the Big Man - AKA Fred - is involved.

However, far far away from all that, Don Blake joins a medical mission to a civil-war-torn South American country, only for the leader of the communist faction to order an attack on the doctors.

Can our hero save his colleagues without giving away his secret identity?

February 1983 - Marvel UK monthlies, 40 years ago this month.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

If British politics ever makes you despair, fear ye not. For, it is 1983 and there's a whole new force that's entered the Westminster scene.

That's right. In February 1983, the Official Monster Raving Loony Party contested its first-ever poll when it stood a candidate in the Bermondsey by-election. That candidate was Screaming Lord Sutch and things would never be the same again.

They'd be worse.

Sadly, for Screaming, he didn't cruise to the victory you might have expected and only managed to garner 97 votes. That, however, was never going to stop him - and his party - from returning, time after time, in the nation's elections, in a strange process where, with each election contested, they seemed to appear more and more sane when compared to the major parties.

Rather more seriously, that month - with the economy crumbling - unemployment had now reached a record high of nearly three and a quarter million.

However, at least someone was still making something and, on the automobile front, the Austin Metro became Britain's best-selling car.

Elsewhere, 37-year-old Pat Jennings of Arsenal and Northern Ireland became the first player in English football to chalk up a thousand senior games.

On the UK singles chart, the month launched with Men At Work's Down Under ruling the roost before it was forced to give way to the unstoppable new phenomenon in British music that was Kajagoogoo with their song Too Shy.

But even they were quickly dethroned by the even more unstoppabler phenomenon that was Michael Jackson's Billie Jean.

Over on the British album chart, events were dominated by Men At Work's Business as Usual which threatened to spend the whole of February on top but, at the month's very death, was displaced by Michael Jackson's Thriller.

The UK's hottest new comic smashes its way into our lives again, as The Daredevils hits its second issue.

In its lead story, Captain Britain's back in his own reality but begins to have visions of the past. Can it be down to the supercomputer Mastermind?

Too right it can.

In the book's second strip, it's trouble for Daredevil when Bullseye abducts the Black Widow, in an attempt to flush our hero out into the open.

And, in the book's third and final tale, it's the 1960s and Spider-Man's still entangled in the Kingpin's kidnapping of J Jonah Jameson, and the subsequent death of Fred Foswell.

Plus, you could win a camera!

Everyone has the sadz because Jean Grey's - allegedly - died and Scott sees no other option but to quit the team.

I do believe the Avengers are still battling the out-of-control Red Ronin.

And Night-Raven's up to something too, thanks to the pens and pencils of Alan Moore and Paul Neary.

Hooray! We get a preview of the upcoming series of everyone's favourite sci-fi show!

And there's a free sticker for those who want a picture of Peter Davison stuck to their school book!

It would appear the comic strip the world knows as The Stockbridge Horror is still ongoing and may have hit Part Three.

There's also a retrospective of the First Doctor's serial The Myth Makers which, as we all know, was set in the time of the Trojan Wars.

I've no information about what happens in this one but its cover promises us Sword and Sorcery at its greatest. So, it must be good.

The magazine dedicated to Britain's second-most popular sci-fi show gives us an interview with Josette Simon.

We're also treated to a five-page comic strip titled Hunted, brought to us by Paul Neary and Phil Gascoine.

And there's a free sticker in this one too. But it doesn't have anyone's face on it and, so, looks a bit boring.

My knowledge of this one is skimpy, to say the least, but it would appear Luke Skywalker meets the water bandits!

It doesn't say if he fights them, or anything. So, maybe he just has a chat with them.

About water.

In the grand tradition of his dad's conversations about sand.

In this month's jam-packed issue, Stephen King and George A Romero talk about their plans for future collaboration.

And Steven Spielberg tells us about the making of ET.

Sybil Danning, meanwhile, dresses up as Shanna the She-Devil and talks about her own life and career.

The Marvel Lucky Bag - February 1983.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Sometimes, there are things lurking in your local swamp that you don't want to know about.

But you did in February 1983.

That's because it was the month which saw the release of the very first Swamp Thing movie, starring Dick Durock and Adrienne Barbeau. It's been so long since I saw it that I can't recall if I liked it or not, although I vaguely recall having preferred its sequel.

The month also saw the release of legendary Stone Age movie Quest for Fire, a film that, to my knowledge, has never had a sequel.

Although, I suppose, technically, every film made ever since has been a sequel to Quest for Fire.

A rather lovely Barry Smith cover adorns this month's issue of the mag that loves to give you pretty pictures.

Inside, more pretty pictures are supplied by Rick Veitch, Marc Hempel, Jim Starlin, Dave Sim, Trina Robbins, Gene Day, Carl Potts, Rick Geary, Barry Smith and Charles Vess.

Between them, they illustrate tales with titles like Two Sisters, Our New Dad, The Vision, The Woman Who Loved the Moon, Arnold the Isshurian, The Horde, A Path of Stars, The Beguiling and Arise Awake, Awakening.

I can sensationally reveal that I know nothing about the plot of any of them.

Speaking of covers, Bill Sienkiewicz gives us another attention-grabber, as our hero returns to Sudan and finds himself protecting a treasure in the temple where Moon Knight was born.

Hooray! Great news for those who missed it the first time round, as Marvel gives us a second chance to encounter the first-ever adventure of the New X-Men!

How well we remember that day when the original members were captured by Krakoa the Living Island, and Professor X had to recruit a team of misfits to rescue them.

But because even that's not enough to keep some people happy, we also get a brand-new tale in which Kitty Pryde shows Illyana around the mansion and talks about the team.

I know!

It sounds riveting!

This month, we get a triple bill from the comic that never stops demanding answers, when the Watcher ponders what would have happened had the Beast and Thing continued to mutate and what would have happened had Galactus turned the Silver Surfer back into boring old Norrin Radd.

At last! It's the fight that had to happen!

OK, I admit it. It's not. It's the fight that probably no one would ever have seen coming, as Rom encounters Shang-Chi son of Fu Manchu. 

It seems the pair unite at the British Museum, in order to prevent a coven of Dire Wraiths from resurrecting the mummy of an Egyptian witch-princess.

Everyone's favourite she-devil with a sword gets another chance at solo stardom, as her latest book hits a shop near you.

I've no idea what happens in it but I do know blue definitely doesn't suit her and she needs to switch back to the bikini as soon as possible.

Joe Jusko supplies the cover, while Mark Gruenwald, Alan Kupperberg, Steven Grant, Paul Smith, Larry Hama, Bob Camp, Mike Carlin, Al Milgrom, Steve Skeates and Steve Smallwood fill the pages with a whole heap of humour-packed goodness that's just right for the Christmas holiday that's on its way.

The book that's traditionally concentrated on Spider-Man team-ups also gives us the combo of Luke Cage and the Son of Satan.

As far as I make out, those two are facing the mind-numbing peril of the Sons of Satannish.

Wait. What's this? The Son of Satan vs the Sons of Satannish? I spot a whole heap of room for confusion in that one.

Sadly, though, I don't know what occurs in the Spidey vs Hulk clash.