February 1st, 1975 - Marvel UK, 50 years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

It's 1975!

It's February!

And how do we know it's February?

Because the brand new Number One on the UK singles chart is called January!

Clearly, something's gone wrong with time there but the band Pilot aren't complaining. They are, after all, the makers of that classic single.

However, on the UK album chart, change is nowhere in sight, as Elton John's Greatest Hits retains the Number One position it's been gripping since Benny and the Jets were in nursery school.

We all need to hold on to something stable because I do believe I see the beginning of the Schemer storyline.

And that can only mean trouble for our hero.

But, also, for Gwen Stacy who, I think, gets nearly totalled by a lorry. Fortunately, Peter Parker's on hand to save her, with the help of a parking meter.

Iron Man's defeated Titanium Man but Happy Hogan's in hospital and Tony Stark can't visit him immediately, thanks to an urgent need to recharge his chest plate.

Will Pepper Potts ever forgive his seeming lack of concern for the welfare of his ever-loyal chauffeur?

And it's a right old mess for a bunch of our favourite Asgardians, as they're stuck on Earth, having been stripped of their powers by Odin.

Loki, at least, has a plan to get his powers back but it involves recruiting the help of Karnilla who inadvertently manages to create the Wrecker instead!

History is made when, hot on the heels of his team-up with Shang-Chi, Spider-Man joins forces with Iron Fist to tackle a man from the future who's living his life backwards.

And things kick up a gear for the Avengers when their butler Jarvis starts acting more than a little oddly and, beneath a demolished tenement, the mysterious Crimson Cowl decides to create the New Masters of Evil. 

Dr Strange, meanwhile, discovers that Clea's fallen under the spell of the sinister Asmodeus.

He mostly finds that out when she tries to murder him.

It's just one thing after another for Jason and Alexander who return to the village, rudely set fire to Brutus's house then flee to the Forbidden Zone where they encounter a race of mutants who use slaves to build their nightmarish war machines.

That's followed by a ten-page article dedicated to the Planet of the Apes TV show, its sets and those who work on them.

And we complete the issue with a Stan Lee/Gene Colan tale in which a radar operator turns off Earth's defences when the alien Krill offer him the most beautiful woman in the universe. Sadly, he soon discovers that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

This is, of course, a tale of the Watcher.

And imparts a message we'd all do well to remember.

I certainly shan't forget it.

Things are getting a little fraught for our team of vampire hunters because, while a gang of hypnotised children are attacking them, Dracula sets about raising an army of the undead!

Meanwhile, the Werewolf by Night has discovered Dragonus Has Entered! Although, frankly, I've no idea what that means, who Dragonus is or just what it is he's entered.

But I do know who Frankenstein's Monster is and I know that, in his strip, the patchwork putz is still in the process of accidentally resurrecting Dracula.

And our last tale is a Lee/Ditko short in which a spy uses shrinking pills to discover military secrets. But, with almost grim inevitability, while on a vital mission, he loses his growth pills and is trapped forever in his tiny form.

It looks like this is the conclusion to the tale in which the Leader's trying to replace the entire American government with humanoid replicas.

Needless to say, he fails in this aim but I do believe Doc Samson loses his super-strength while rescuing the Hulk from the villain's latest super-weapon.

This week's Daredevil yarn is called Unmasked. I am, therefore, going to assume it's the one in which DD disguises himself as Matt Murdock disguising himself as Daredevil, in order that the Boss - who's kidnapped Karen Page - won't realise he really is Daredevil.

I can't help feeling he should have disguised himself as Matt Murdock disguising himself as Mike Murdock disguising himself as Daredevil disguising himself as Thor, disguising himself as Matt Murdock, disguising himself as Daredevil, just to keep things grounded.

And, of course, we get more of the thriller in which Dr Doom's stolen the Silver Surfer's powers!

Speak Your Brain! Part 96.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Image by Tumisu
from Pixabay

Why, look what I espy. If it's not the first Speak Your Brain of 2025.

But will that new year bring fresh changes to this feature or shall old traditions be adhered to?

I don't have a clue. I'm just doing what any legendary writer does and typing any old rubbish in order to get the post written.

But you may have more of a clue.

And, if you do, this is the perfect place for it because Speak Your Brain is the sensational feature in which you The Reader get to decide the topic of the day. And that topic could be just about anything.

Therefore, spurn ye not the chance to have your voice heard, and make sure to post that topic in the comments section below.

January 1985 - Marvel UK monthlies, 40 years ago this month.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

There's an awful lot of talk of electric cars, these days but that's nothing new. Back in January 1985, the whole world was about to rush out and buy such a vehicle, thanks to that month's launch of the Sinclair C5, a battery-assisted car designed by the British inventor Clive Sinclair. It was, in very many ways, the Tesla Cybertruck of its day and it's no surprise that every single UK home has one in its garage.

Almost as successful and iconic are, of course, Britain's red telephone boxes but, in January 1985, they were about to become an endangered species. For, that was the very time British Telecom announced it was going to phase them out. However, forty years later, there are still plenty to be found if one knows the magic places in which to look for them.

But what of human suffering? It seemed the levels of it were about to be reduced - at least physically if not musically - because in the United States, the charity single We Are the World was busy being recorded by USA for Africa.

And speaking of music, that single's British forebear Do They Know It's Christmas? by Band Aid kicked off January atop the UK singles chart before being deposed by Foreigner's I Want to Know What Love Is.

While, on the associated album chart, the month arrived with Various Artists' The Hits Album dominant before that was displaced by Alison Moyet's Alf which then had to make way for Foreigner's fancily titled Agent Provocateur.

The nation's favourite sci-fi mag is back to give us all the latest goss on the worlds of speculative fiction.

And that means Joe Dante's here to talk about his new film Gremlins. 

We also gain an insight into Giorgio Moroder's take on Metropolis, a look at Aussie pig horror Razorback and a retrospective of the film the world can only refer to as Psycho.

It's a rare honour indeed for Colin Baker, as he's actually allowed to appear on the front cover of the magazine dedicated to the show he's the star of.

And so is Peri actress Nicola Bryant.

And, speaking of which, Bryant's the subject of an interview contained within. I suspect this is still during the period in which she's under orders to pretend to be an American. A pretence which I'm sure, has fooled us all.

Elsewhere, Doctor Who producer John Nathan-Turner gives us his report on America's Panopticon West Convention. And there's a look back at anniversary special The Five Doctors.

Arnie is before us again, as the company's adaptation of his film Conan the Destroyer continues unassuaged.

And there's a fabulous role-playing competition!

Other than that, all I can say is this book is also still incorporating strips from The Mighty World of Marvel but I could not, for the life of me, say which ones.

But what's this? Just when it seemed Marvel UK was in terminal decline, a brand new publication hits the shops of this fair land?

And starring none other than Captain Britain?

With chutzpah like that, how could it possibly fail?

In our main story, it could be trouble for the good captain when his old nemesis Chief Inspector Dai Thomas tells his superiors he has suspicions Captain Britain and Brian Braddock may be none other than the same person!

Then we have Abslom Daak in The Making of a Dalek Killer, as reprinted from the pages of Doctor Who Weekly #17.

Then we get what appears to be a reprint of Night-Raven's first ever appearance, from way back in 1979's Hulk comic #1.

Next, there's a four-page outing for something called Paragon of Painthorpe Street. I have no idea what it is but it's the handiwork of John Tomlinson and Jeff Anderson.

And, just to send us home happy, we finish off with The Freefall Warriors from Steve Parkhouse and Jerry Paris.

January 25th, 1975 - Marvel UK, 50 years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

This week in 1975 saw bad news hit those who fancied going to Europe for a day trip.

That's because it was the week in which work was abandoned on digging the Anglo-French Channel Tunnel. It seemed mankind's long-held dream of reaching France without risking seasickness was destined never to materialise. 

Not that I'd have cared. I'd rather cross the Channel in a hovercraft. That's far more James Bond. And, as we all know, you can judge the worth of anything by how James Bond it is.

Also that week, jazz pianist Keith Jarrett played the solo improvisation The Köln Concert at the Cologne Opera. This may not sound like big news but it seems it went on to become the best-selling piano recording in history.

And what of television?

January 25th saw BBC Two broadcast Hammer's The Plague of the Zombies as its Midnight Movie. A decision of which I thoroughly approve.

And music? Was it too pulling its weight?

I cannot pass judgement but, that week, Ms Grace by the Tymes ascended to claim the Number One spot on the UK singles chart.

Meanwhile, the accompanying album chart was still being  dominated by Elton John's Greatest Hits, as it had been for several weeks.

Spidey wraps up his latest battle with Electro. And does so in the studio where he was supposed to be guesting in a chat show.

Elsewhere, Iron Man continues his first-ever battle with the Titanium Man but, when he sends Happy Hogan to bring him a vital piece of equipment, the chauffeur gets caught up in the fight and is seriously injured.

Lastly, having been released from custody by Loki paying his bail, Thor now has to battle the evil god, on the streets of New York, even though the thunder god possesses only a fraction of his former power!

Is this the best cover we've ever seen commissioned specially for a Marvel UK mag?

It may be. And we have to thank Arvell Jones and Keith Pollard for its existence.

As I think we can all guess, this is the one in which the Black Panther must defeat the Grim Reaper, in order to revive the Avengers from their deathlike comas.

He also has to avoid being shot by the police, while he's at it.

But, before that, we get more from Iron Fist who's, yet again, battling against would-be assassins. And, again, he's aided by that mystery ninja who keeps popping up everywhere.

Considering how much he keeps rescuing the Fist. I'm starting to think it's Mystery Ninja who should have been given his own strip.

And what of Dr Strange?

The good doctor's in the process of trying to rescue Clea from the Sons of the Satannish and it's going so badly that he too might need to be bailed out by a ninja.

The troubles just keep coming for Jason and Alexander. No sooner have they escaped into a jungle than they return to their village, looking to appeal to everyone's good sense.

And because no one has good sense, they're then forced to exeunt pursued by gorillas.

Next, we get a never-to-be-forgotten single-page article about Stan Lee's recent trip to London. One that includes news of the Sensational Alex Harvey Band.

Why it contains news of the Sensational Alex Harvey Band, I don't recall.

And then it's a treat for us all, as we experience Marvel's adaptation of Fredric Brown's Arena in which an Earthman must combat a hostile alien to decide which of their species will be allowed, by rulers of another species, to win an ongoing war.

This tale does, of course, bear striking similarities to the Star Trek episode of the same title.

Sadly, it doesn't, at any point, feature a man building a cannon from a bamboo shoot.

It may be the Hulk on that cover but, inside, the focus is very much on Jim Wilson who uncovers yet more of the plot to replace America's big wigs with robots.

And discovers the man he thought was Glenn Talbot is, in fact, none other than that fiendishly foreheaded felon of infamy the Leader!

Meanwhile, I do believe Daredevil's undecided as to whether to propose to Karen Page as Matt Murdock or as his non-existent brother. Possibly, he'd be better off visiting a psychiatrist instead.

Not that it might matter, as a gangster called The Boss has decided he likes the idea of kidnapping the woman. And, therefore, he does kidnap her.

Finally, the Fantastic Four think they have problems, with the Sandman and Wizard trying to bust free from captivity but they don't know what trouble is - because their arch-nemesis Dr Doom's realised he quite fancies having the powers of the Silver Surfer.

And he knows just how to get them...

You could never accuse Dracula of not liking children. After all, this week, he's completely surrounding himself with them.

Admittedly, that's only because he's hypnotised them into attacking our regular cast of Dracula hunters.

When it comes to those of a lycanthropic leaning, Jack Russell's ally Father Ramon Joquez is possessed by someone called Aelfric who's been trapped in The Darkhold.

And what's this? Do I detect the beginnings of the Crossover From Hell?

Too right I do because this is the week in which Frankenstein's Monster hangs out with a group of gypsy entertainers and manages to get himself tricked into helping one of them return Dracula to life!

Atlas/Seaboard January 1975.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Last month, just two Atlas/Seaboard productions greeted us in this feature but Martin and Chip Goodman are in no mood to mess about. And so it is that, this time out, we find five brand new titles awaiting us when we rush into our favourite retailer of American publications.

A big fat 68 pages of terror signal that Weird Tales of the Macabre has entered our lives, and does it with such tales as The Demon is Dying!, Time Lapse, A Second Life, The Cheese Is For The Rats, Tour de Force and Speed Demon, from the likes of Ernie Colón, Martin Pasko, Leo Summers, Enrique Sánchez Abulí, Manel Ferrer, Ramón Torrents and many others.

There's also a Gary Gerani article dedicated to The Many Horrors of Dan Curtis.

Redoubtable as it may be, this title will endure for just two issues.

Possibly my favourite Atlas comic of them all is launched, as an astronaut's rescued from a crashed space lab, by aliens, only to discover they intend to destroy mankind.

With an incentive like that, it's not long before he steals a hi-tech suit from them and sets out to stop their attack on Reykjavik.

Let's be honest, if that Dick Giordano/Sal Amendola cover doesn't make you want to buy this thing, nothing will.

A legend is born when Ironjaw cleaves, threatens and axes his way into infamy.

It's the far-flung future and our hero's just hanging around, minding his own business of murdering, ravishing and maiming everyone he encounters, when a sequence of events leads him to an encounter with a princess who's secretly his sister, making him the unknowing heir to the throne.

Will he manage to be prevented from killing her and us for long enough to discover the truth about himself?

And, really, would any kingdom seriously want to be ruled by him?

Another sensational first issue hits our brains and, through it, we thrill to the origin of the Grim Ghost when an 18th Century highwayman is executed but then sent to 20th Century Earth to do Satan's bidding.

Yes, this does sound like a mashup of the Spectre and Ghost Rider but I'm sure it will prove to hit the heights of originality.

I'm going to assume this is Atlas/Seaboard's answer to Vampirella. But can it hope to match the sexiness of that mag?

That, I cannot say, as I've never read it.

However, I can reveal that its cover is by someone called Pujolar and that, wrapped inside it, we encounter such yarns as Satan's Domain, The Lost Tomb of Nefertiri, Lay of the Sea, Midnight Muse, Merchants of Evil! and William Shakespeare's The Tempest.

We also meet a 6-page article called Filmdom's Vampire Lovers, and I think we can guess what that's about. I suspect Hammer will be getting many a mention.

As for this mag, I can announce it will last for just two issues.

2000 AD - December 1986.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

It's 1986 and Christmas is well and truly on its way.

But what if we've been bad?

What if, when he gets here, Santa decides that, instead of rewarding us, he's going to punish us? That sack of his looks easily big enough to accommodate us all. And it seems to be inescapable.

There's only one thing for it.

We'll have to take refuge in our local picture house. He'll never find us there.

But just what's on offer in that picture house?

Among other things, what's on offer are Heartbreak Ridge, The Golden Child, Three Amigos, King Kong Lives, Little Shop of Horrors and Platoon.

Impressively, the only one of those films I've ever seen is King Kong Lives.

And I've seen it three times.

And, having seen it those three times, there's absolutely no way I'm ever going to believe it's even possible for it to be the film of any month, let alone this one.

Other opinions are, of course, available.

But what of the musical exploits of the human race?

For the UK singles chart, December kicked off with Europe's The Final Countdown on top before it was deposed by the Housemartins' Caravan of Love.

But then, with just two weeks to go before the end of the year, and thanks to a legendary but nightmarish claymation video, Jackie Wilson's Reet Petite snatched the throne, to claim that year's Christmas Number One slot for its very own.

No such bubbling, frothing and churning on the accompanying UK album chart, because Now That's What I Call Music! 8 spent the entirety of that month at Number One.

And what of the galaxy's greatest comic? What was it up to as Rudolph prepared to power up the dynamo on his shiny nose?

The big news was that it hit its 500th issue. And how many comics can make that boast? Certainly not any of the ones that had merged with it over the years before being totally subsumed by it.

And, to celebrate such glad tidings; that month, the mag was feeding us a diet of Sláine, Sooner or Later, Strontium Dog, Judge Dredd, Rogue Trooper, Nemesis, Tharg's Future-Shocks, something called Tharg's Head Revisited, and Bad Company.

Sadly, there seems to have been no return for the likes of Shako, Bill Savage, Dan Dare, MACH 1 or the Harlem Heroes to mark the occasion.

January 18th, 1975 - Marvel UK, 50years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

We may not have been rocking all over the world, this week in 1975 but we were, at least, rocking all over our living rooms, as unstoppable three-chord wonders Status Quo hit the top spot on the UK singles chart with their latest smash Down Down. I would tell you how that song goes but, if you're at all familiar with the Quo, I'm sure you can guess exactly how it goes.

Over on the UK album chart, there was no change at the summit, with Elton John's Greatest Hits still ruling supreme over all other LPs.

I have no great objection to that Status Quo single but there are tracks in this world that I like more, and among the songs I approved of on that week's UK Hit Parade were:

Streets of London - Ralph McTell

The Bump - Kenny

Stardust - David Essex

Juke Box Jive - the Rubettes

January - Pilot

Gonna Make You a Star - David Essex

Hey Mister Christmas - Showaddywaddy

and

Angie Baby - Helen Reddy.

Should one feel the need to explore such matters in greater depth, that week's UK singles chart can be found here.

While the corresponding LP rankings may be uncovered herewithin.

When it came to TV on January 18th, the two standouts for me are that, in the morning, BBC One was showing The Flashing Blade, that French serial about the War of the Mantuan Succession. Who would have thought that, in 1975, British children would be watching a drama about the War of the Mantuan Succession? Not me. Mostly because I don't even know what that was.

And, yet, still I watched it.

And BBC Two was, late that night, beaming Frankenstein Created Woman into our homes. A film I rewatched just the other day, thanks to the miracle of digital broadcasting.

Can it be? Must the Hulk combat the Sandman after the silicate psychopath has been transformed into some sort of pointy-eared pixie fiend?

No, it can't be.

From what I can recall, nothing at all resembling the events of this cover take place in this issue.

Instead, our hero's hanging around in a desert while, back in civilisation, Jim Wilson stumbles across a plot to replace major figures in the US military with robot duplicates.

But who could be behind that plot?

And why?

Meanwhile, round the back of a university and unknown to mankind, Daredevil's busy thwarting aliens who want to conquer this planet by using their blinding ray on us all.

Little do they suspect they've managed to come up against the one opponent their weapon can't harm.

And, inside the Baxter Building, the Fantastic Four bring Klaw's assault on their HQ to a haymaking halt when Reed gets his hands on a pair of vibranium knuckledusters sent to him, post haste, by the Black Panther.

Iron Fist is back - and with a cover drawn by Jim Starlin, no less.

Before we get to see just what he and his fist are up to, we must first survive a Dr Strange drama in which the Sorcerer Supreme must tackle the Sons of Satannish who look like they're going to succeed in kidnapping the hapless Clea.

And what's this? The Avengers are about to get a new member?

Or at least they will if the Black Panther can convince the police he's not the one who's just murdered them.

That was of course, a crime committed by the Grim Reaper, out to avenge the death of his brother Wonder Man.

Iron Fist, meanwhile, brings this issue to a close by surviving an assassination attempt and then landing a job as bodyguard to Professor Lee Wing and his daughter Colleen.

The action levels ramp up for Jason and Alexander when Brutus seizes power in the village and orders all humans be killed.

It seems our heroes are going to have to flee the scene.

And quickly.

Following that, we're treated to a two-page article which takes a look at the making of the Planet of the Apes TV show.

And, with the departure of Dr Doom's strip, a brand new series begins, as The Wonder of the Watcher! smashes its way into our unsuspecting brains.

Yes, it's the one in which that selfsame character stands around telling us all just what dread series of events led to his people's vow to never again interfere in the affairs of other worlds.

A vow that, as we know, he refuses to ever break, under any circumstances.

Ever.

Those cobbles. That fog. Those medieval buildings. It can only be one place.

1970s London.

And just how is Dracula coping with such untrammelled modernity?

The same way he copes with any kind of thing. by throwing evil at it. 

In this thrilling instalment Frank Drake's introduced to the Harkers while Dracula's on the roam, hypnotising children and ordering them to attack his persecutors.

Elsewhere, Jack Russell's still being captured by Mark Cephalos who still wants to make use of the energy released by his werewolf transformations.

And Frankenstein's Monster still believes he's found the last descendant of Frankenstein.

And is still wrong about that.

I do detect that Electro's back.

And that means this must be the one in which Spidey agrees to appear on a TV chat show but it only goes and turns out it's at a studio where the voltage-packed villain just happens to be working as an electrician!

Elsewhere, evil communist Boris Bullski wants to take on Iron Man. And, so, is Titanium Man born!

Now the hero of the West must combat the hero of the East in a battle broadcast live across the world.

Even though his opponent keeps cheating with hidden weapons.

And things seem to be looking up for Thor. He's been arrested for helping the Circus of Crime get up to their usual mischief but why should he care?

After all, some mysterious stranger has posted his bail for him and he can walk straight out of that police cell.

But hold on. Who is that stranger and why does Thor feel he's met him somewhere before?

You know? That mysterious stranger who looks and acts and speaks exactly like his evil brother?

The Marvel Lucky Bag - January 1985.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

I can sensationally declare that I haven't seen a single film that came out in January 1985. I have, though, heard of most of the January 1985 releases I'm about to list. And those films are The Plague Dogs, Too Scared to Scream, Blood Simple and The Falcon and the Snowman.

Given my total ignorance, I shall make no attempt to rank them and shall, instead, get on with contemplating just what we'll find if we look at a random selection of Marvel mags bearing that month's cover date.

The sensational She-Hulk may struggle to sustain a comic of her own but that doesn't prevent her from getting an entire graphic novel in her honour.

In it, our heroine's captured by SHIELD who fear she'll become as big a menace as her less popular cousin. 

However, somewhere along the way, a bunch of intelligent cockroaches attack the Helicarrier, and She-Hulk gets exposed to enough radiation to prevent her ever becoming Jennifer Walters again.

The New Mutants get their very first Special Edition and it ties in with the below-mentioned X-Men annual.

It does that because the Enchantress sets out to capture them and they find themselves separated from each other on Asgard where they must reunite, find their bearings, defeat the villainess and set out to rescue Storm.

Speaking of which, from that cover, I'm going to assume this is the one in which Storm gets her powers back, thanks to the schemings and machinations of Loki. All of which necessitates a journey to the land of the Norse gods, for our favourite mutants.

If so, that's a bit of a shock, bearing in mind she only lost her abilities a couple of months ago. I'd always assumed she endured a substantial length of time before regaining them.

Not to be outdone by proper comics, Marvel Age gets its first-ever annual.

This thrilling tome seems to centre around chaos breaking out at the Marvel offices when a whole bunch of super-heroes and villains turn up and have a brawl.

On top of that, we find such features as Epic Comics Preview, Star Comics Preview, Marvel Goes Hollywood, Carl Burgos - A Memorial for the Man Who Lit the Torch and The Quotations of Chairman Doom.

Yet another graphic novel hits a retailer near us, thanks to the arrival of Raven Banner!

It seems to be an Alan Zelenetz/Charles Vess tale in which a flighty Asgardian must find his courage and retrieve a Raven Banner from the trolls who've captured it. If he doesn't, the whole of Asgard will fall prey to mighty giants.

I'm not sure why possession of a banner would make any difference to such a thing. But Asgardians, they're a strange bunch.

And here's another graphic novel. This time, starring She-Hulk, Storm, Tigra and the Wasp.

It seems the town of Venture Ridge has been isolated from the rest of the humanity, by a mighty forcefield.

But not to fear, because the wishes of Holly-Ann Ember are able to summon the above-mentioned heroines to the rescue.

Interesting to see Storm in her original costume. Can this have significance?

Blimey. Now Conan's getting a graphic novel!

I can shed no light upon the contents of this one, other than to reveal that its story's called The Witch Queen of Acheron.

But, then, you probably noticed that, from looking at the cover.

Back to the normal comics.

In this month's adventure, Selene and Emmanuel Da Costa join the Hellfire Club, Sunspot consumes Colossus, Aletys brings Magneto to his island, and Mirage and Cannonball discover that Wolfsbane and Sunspot have the powers of Cloak and Dagger!

You can't move for the New Mutants, this month. Not content with having their own Special Edition, having a monthly mag and guest-starring in the X-Men's annual, they now get their first-ever annual of their own. Clearly, someone at Marvel HQ likes them.

But will we like them?

It seems they attend a Lila Cheney concert. Only for Lila to be attacked by an alien who teleports her and Cannonball to a Dyson sphere.

But what's this? The devious Lila is trying to steal the Earth!?! You wouldn't get that kind of behaviour from Taylor Swift.

And that's why Taylor Swift doesn't have a Marvel comic.

At least, I'm assuming she doesn't.

Thinking about it, she probably does.