Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon.
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Amongst the most spoken of were The Aviator, Lust in the Dust, A Private Function, The Purple Rose of Cairo, Ghoulies, Friday the 13th: A New Beginning, Porky's Revenge!, The Care Bears Movie, Desperately Seeking Susan and Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment.
I do believe Desperately Seeking Susan is the only one of those I've ever seen and I struggle to recall anything about it, other than who appears in it. I shall, therefore, reserve judgement as to which of the above movies is the finest and leave it for others to decide.
I think we've all been praying for a GI Joe Yearbook and, at last, we have one.
This looks like a recipe for disaster. Victor von Doom now has the power of the Beyonder and is assuring everyone they have nothing to worry about because he's now a good guy.
It would appear Groo's not the only blade-swinging sensation to get a comic, this month. For, as we can all see, Swords of the Swashbucklers has now entered the chat.
I've not visited the Defenders for a while in this feature but it's clear they've not lost any of their talent for getting into trouble.
I've no defined idea of what occurs in this one but it seems to involve Cloak, Dagger and various other people getting their powers back and forth from various other characters.
Yet another new book enters our lives, as Moonshadow #1 brings us an adventure called Songs of Happy Chear.
I'm genuinely struggling to make sense of that Mike Kaluta cover but it has a certain appeal, whatever it's supposed to be.
Speaking of the Hyborean Age, Red Sonja's latest mag is still going strong and, this month, it would appear she and her friends come to the aid of a settlement besieged by Mongols.
Grab your scimitar because a brand new mag enters our lives when Groo the Wanderer cleaves his bloody way through a brutal and harsh world.
Within it, we find a tale in which Cobra's captured a prominent nuclear physicist, and Joe's gang have to reform in order to stage a rescue.
But that's not all, because we also encounter various text articles about he and his friends.
The trouble is everyone thinks otherwise and they start to hatch a plot to bring him down.
Apparently, someone called Domino learns she's related to someone called Raader, while someone or other else attempts to rescue Domino's parents from someone called Admiral J'Rel.
And, this time, they find that trouble when a giant growth spreads across town and starts heading towards the Angel's mountaintop villa!
Sadly, that's all I can reveal about the contents of this one, other than JM DeMatteis and Jon J Muth are the men behind it all.
Also, its contents are painted.
Inside, in search of the Serpent Ring, Thoth Amun slaughters a bunch of sorcerers then forms an alliance with Baron Maloric. I've no idea who that is but it sounds like he's going to spell trouble for Conan.
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9 comments:
Charlie has never seen any of these covers before. He, too, struggles to make sense of the Conan cover.
Charlie buys maybe four or five new comics every year. The two most recently bought also had unintelligible art on the inside (one was a Justice Society and one was the Atom last month.]
Charlie’s question is “why is the art uninterpretable?” Surely editors look at it first and sprinkle some holy water on it before going to print?
So how, then, do we end up with art like the Conan cover?
I saw DESPERATELY SEEKING SUSAN but like you, Steve, I remember very little about it. I think I might also have seen PURPLE ROSE OF CAIRO, but wouldn’t swear to it. I want to say it stars Jeff Daniels as the lead character whose dialogue sounds suspiciously like Woody Allen should be saying it…?
I didn’t buy a single one of these comics. The Defenders and New Mutants covers look pretty nice. The Conan cover is indeed confusing — I don’t see a scantily-clad lady clinging to someone’s knee ANYWHERE.
b.t.
I never saw Desperately Seeking Susan at the time. I remember the whole Madonna hoopla of 1985 very very clearly though, and I have come to like 'Into The Groove' a fair bit. But I only sat down to watch it about 5 years ago, and just gave up after half an hour. It was like a curdled Jonathan Demme movie.
I did go and see 'the Purple Rose Of Cairo' though. On a date with a girl with whom it didn't work. I thought it was a bit boring to be honest, and having watched it at least once more since I still do. I'm not a fan of the heavily-lauded 85-89 Woody Allen movies. I liked ones immediately before [Broadway Danny Rose is gold] and after [Crimes & Misdemeanors is great].
I think A Private Function is probably my favourite out of all those.
Comics. A LOT of barbarians kicking around this month, aren't there?
I only had the New Mutants out of this lot. Yeah, the plot was something to do with a couple of the Mutants unwillingly taking on Cloak & Dagger's powers and being unhappy about it.
Oh, no - hang on. I didn't have it at the time but I did buy a tpb of Moonshadow from a remainder bookshop in Soho in the 1990s and it was SHIT, so I sold it on quickly.
I quite like that Conan cover - it's definitely more Epic Illustrated than newsstand Marvel. Surely a thing to be celebrated?
*'with a girl with whom it didn't work OUT'. Just so there's no misunderstandings there.
Matthew:
That CONAN THE KING cover is very striking, it’s true. It’s also true that it’s a bit difficult to figure out exactly what’s going on it. The color both helps and hinders— it’s a pleasing color combo but it doesn’t do much to clarify the various elements: where do the sorcerer’s hands end and the squid-wrapped skull begin? etc.
b.t.
Steve, surely you also recall that Desperately Seeking Susan featured the song Into The Groove which became Madonna's first No.1 hit in the UK in August 1985.
There's now a growing international movement to boycott American products and I've just been looking at a list of what we Brits can boycott. The list includes Colgate toothpaste which I regularly buy and which I didn't even realise was American. Trump says the boycott of Musk's Tesla cars is "illegal" - aawww, boo hoo.
I only had ( and still have) Groo from the above comics . I remember seeing Desperatly Seeking Susan at the cinema but like Steve I remember very little about it other than it seemed strange that it " co-starred" Rosanna Arquette who seemed to be the main star ( for screen tine aline) and not Madonna.
Colin-
The weird thing is, since Musk revealed himself as an unhinged megalomaniacal neo--fascist, Tesla's stock has nosedived. it's taken a big hit.
It was liberals that bought those cars! Or white collar people trying to look trendy.
You think a redneck would be caught dead in one?
Now nobody wants the damn things.
M.P.
Paul:
Yes! I had the same reaction to Rosanna Arquette being the true main character of DSS (and frankly more of an appealing screen presence than Madonna). I’d forgotten that until you reminded me just now.
Colin:
I expect an Executive Order any day now requiring all Americans to buy a Tesla.
b.t.
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