The Marvel Lucky Bag - January 1984.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

January 1974 didn't see the release of many movies of distinction but it did, at least, see the unleashing of the film that can only be known as Xtro.

Granted, I say it's a movie of distinction but I must confess to never having seen it, nor ever having noticed it showing up in any TV listings.

However, I remember its soundtrack album frequently being advertised on the back of Starburst magazine. Therefore, I shall do the obvious and assume my ignorance of the film is not shared by the rest of humanity.

Marvel makes yet another attempt to make Jack of Hearts be a thing.

In this thrilling issue of this thrilling mini-series, Jack becomes despondent about his inability to control his destructive power. Then, former girlfriend Marcy Kane shows up, hinting at secrets.

What secrets?

Who can know? Before he gets the chance to find out, alien spaceships appear and distract him from the matter.

Assistant Editors Month has taken over this month's Defenders.

And that means this mag kicks off with a two-page story in which Ann Nocenti takes over the Marvel offices.

Regular readers will know she also turns up in this month's Incredible Hulk. There's clearly no stopping the woman.

That's followed by a full-length Defenders tale in which something happens but I'm not sure what.

judging by that cover, I assume that whatever it is isn't good news for the Angel.

It's the team-up we've all been crying out for, as the X-Men and Micronauts unite to tackle a mutual threat.

If my memory serves me well, that threat is the evil alter-ego of Professor X - who's taken to wearing a Roman gladiator's outfit, for reasons I can't recall.

I'm pretty sure Baron Karza's involved in it all, as well.

It's the meeting that had to happen, as Aunt May confronts the power and might of Galactus.

Franklin Richards is also involved but I'm sure we don't care so much about him.

In a twist so shocking it could send a man insane, it would seem Aunt May becomes Galactus' new herald and she and Franklin go off in search of the universe's biggest Twinkie.

Seriously.

That's an actual story.

In an actual book.

Written by someone.

The Avengers land their 12th-ever annual but I can shed little light upon their activities within.

Judging by the cover copy, though, I'm going to assume we're about to see a clash between our heroes and the mighty Inhumans.

Marvel's favourite space knight reaches his 50th issue - and does so with a double-sized comic; within which, Starshine gets new armour, the Skrulls arrive to battle the Dire Wraiths, and we get the revelation that the villains are, in fact, deviant members of the Skrull race.

The X-Men's 7th annual sees the merry mutants confront the cosmic horror of the Impossible Man. Is this the first time he's ever appeared outside the pages of The Fantastic Four?

Whether it is or it isn't, the infuriating alien steals the X-Mansion. In response, the chromosomal crimefighters chase him to SHIELD's Helicarrier, the Savage Land, the Avengers Mansion and then to the Marvel Comics building where he attempts to steal Stan Lee.

January 12th 1974 - Marvel UK, 50 years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

A new year may have been well and truly out of the starting blocks in 1974 but there was precious little sign of movement at the peak of the UK singles chart, with Slade's unstoppable anthem Merry Xmas Everybody still hogging the top spot.

And it was an identical scene atop the album chart, with Yes still ruling the roost, thanks to their latest bid to give Roger Dean work with Tales From Topographic Oceans.

My love for Slade goes without saying but there were other singles I approved of on that week's Top 50. And those songs were:

The Show Must Go On - Leo Sayer

I Wish It Could Be Christmas Every Day - Wizzard

My Coo-Ca-Choo - Alvin Stardust

Dance with The Devil - Cozy Powell

Lamplight - David Essex

Roll Away the Stone - Mott the Hoople

Amoureuse - Kiki Dee

Goodbye Yellow Brick Road - Elton John

Mind Games - John Lennon

Photograph - Ringo Starr

How Come? - Ronnie Lane & Slim Chance

and

Living for The City - Stevie Wonder.

Should you wish to explore the matter in greater depth, that week's UK singles chart may be found here.

While the corresponding LP chart is located within.

What sorcery is this? The Mighty World of Marvel has a glossy cover? Have the printers had a mare and mixed it up with the latest issue of The Avengers?

Verily, I say the nay. And, possibly, neigh, as well.

It can be announced that a whole new era of Marvel UK begins as, from now on, all its weekly books get the shiny-fronted treatment once reserved for the world's mightiest super-team.

And how excited was I when I first clapped eyes on this book?

Not in the slightest, as I must confess I never had this issue. Oh, the bitter horror that I should have missed out on such a momentous event.

Behind that cover, with the Hulk once more in custody, Thunderbolt Ross tries to find someone who can keep the jade juggernaut imprisoned.

And he finds him.

In the Leader.

Who's going to trap him in an unbreakable rubber prison.

Why do I get the feeling that trusting the Leader might not turn out to be the best decision Thunderbolt's ever made?

Then again, has he actually ever made a good decision? I'm struggling to think of one.

When it comes to the Fantastic Four, despite what it says on the cover, Dr Doom's nowhere in sight. Instead, the Mole Man's kidnapping large chunks of New York real estate - and only the FF can stop him.

Assuming they can prevent the Avengers from doing it first.

It seems all of Aunt May's financial worries are over when Otto Octavius decides to become her lodger.

However, he's only doing it to hide out from the police and it's a mere a matter of time before he's fighting Spidey, and May's having another of her turns.

Elsewhere, Thor and the Absorbing Man are still battling on the streets of New York.

But, fearing the villain might still contrive to lose, Loki transports him to Asgard where he gets into a scrap with everyone in sight.

Needless to say, the thunder god's all set to pursue him but there's a complication when reporter Harris Hobbs discovers his secret identity and demands to be given a tour of that fabled realm, in return for his silence.

Can it be? Have the Mandarin and Swordsman teamed up to belittle and banjax our heroes?

It seems they have.

For, between them, they manage to convince the Avengers that Iron Man wants the sabre-swinging scoundrel to be the team's newest member. And, so, a new member he becomes.

Needless to say, it's not going to be long before hostilities break out again.

Tragically, I can shed no light upon just what Dr Strange is up to in this issue.

I've no doubt, though, that it'll be something positively preternatural.

Forty years ago today - January 1984.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Let us delve, once more, into what the world's mightiest heroes have to offer us in that far-off land that wise men know as Yesteryear.

Hooray! It's Assistant Editors Month!

And that means we can look forward to a whole pile of stories that wouldn't have seen the light of day under any sane circumstances.

The first example we consume is a bizarre one in which Daredevil meets a character who's clearly Tarzan. But a Tarzan totally devoid of the traits that might make him admirable.

When one of his wives gets run over by a car, the jungle lord decides to take it out on everybody else, despite not being that bothered that she's been killed.

Meanwhile, in the issue's backup tale, a schoolboy's in-depth report on Daredevil is interrupted by a fight between that red-clad hero and someone called Turk.

Reed Richards is still on trial for saving the life of Galactus and, thus, dooming the Skrull homeworld.

However, the prosecution hasn't counted on the Watcher, Galactus and even Eternity showing up to provide evidence for the defence.

The strangest part of this story is that its writer and artist John Byrne appears in it when he's taken along to watch the trial in person.

It's another fourth-wall breaker, as Bruce Banner decides to visit the offices of Marvel writer/editor Anne Nocenti and bemoan his lot in life, while she tries to gee him up.

However, ashamed of himself for committing treason in his vendetta against the Hulk, Thunderbolt Ross decides the best way to make amends for it is by killing himself.

Then he decides it isn't.

In our first story of the issue, a gang of kids who role-play as the Avengers expel their Iron Man stand-in, on the grounds that the real Shellhead's left the real Avengers.

Needless to say, he's not best pleased about this turn of events.

And, needless to say, events soon show them what a mistake they've made.

Meanwhile, in our second tale, Tony Stark manages to go a whole day without booze, thanks to a bet from a cop who has it in for alcoholics.

And things just get stranger, this month, as Spider-Man must deal with the return of the Fly - in a tale drawn by cartoonist Fred Hembeck, in the style of Fred Hembeck.

Meanwhile, will Spider-Man reveal his true identity to the Black Cat?

In the first of this issue's stories, Spidey completes his fight with Thunderball whose power's been amplified by his acquisition of the Wrecker's magic crowbar.

And, in its second yarn, the wallcrawler visits a young fan, explains his powers, tells him his origin and even reveals his secret identity to him.

Has the man gone completely mad?

No. He's only done it because he knows his secrets are safe in the hands of someone who's about to drop dead from leukemia.

The Mighty Thor clearly has no time for all this Assistant Editors malarkey. His book gives us a perfectly normal tale in which Odin has dwarves create a hammer for Beta Ray Bill and then sends him back into space to rescue his people.

And Thor decides he wants to tag along too!

It's all meant to be fun and games, as the surplus-to-requirements Avengers agree to make a guest appearance on David Letterman's show.

Sadly for them, would-be super-villain Fabian Stankowicz decides to try and kill them all, live on air.

Meanwhile, back at the Avengers Mansion, the Vision's attitude is getting more unsettling by the day.

In a tale drawn by Jazzy John Romita, Mystique practices fighting the X-Men, with the aid of Arcade's robots - and it's all part of her plan to free Rogue from the heroes' clutches!

However, it turns out she has a noticeable reluctance to harm Nightcrawler.

Just why could that be?

And how could it tie in with him not knowing who his mother is?

In our main adventure, Cap returns to the present and tries to prevent the Brand Corporation's planned massacre of all super-heroes.

However, in our backup tale, Bernie Rosenthal has a dream about what it'd be like if she were Captain America and in the Avengers.

In this month's thrilling tale from before the dawn of history, someone called Raskos tries to form an alliance with some man-bats.

Happily, that plan doesn't get him anywhere, because Conan leads a bunch of bird-men to victory against those man-bats.

I'm hoping at least one of the Bird-Men sounds like Brian Blessed.

The Marvel Lucky Bag - January 1974.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

Hark! Do you hear them? The creatures of the night?

You certainly did if you entered a cinema in the first month of 1974.

It was, after all, a month which unleashed upon us The Satanic Rites of Dracula and The Bat People.

Fortunately, for those who don't appreciate nocturnal flappings, that January also saw the release of John Wayne's McQ, and something called Rhinoceros. The latter of which was, it seems, a comedy starring both Zero Mostel and Gene Wilder.

In all honesty, I think the only one of those four films I've seen is The Satanic Rites of Dracula. Therefore, I see no choice but to name it the official Steve Does Comics' Film of the Month.

Ka-Zar gets the first issue of what feels like his millionth comic!

Sadly, I possess limited knowledge of what happens in it, other than it seems to feature more flashbacks than you can shake a T Rex at. And that's a lot of flashbacks.

Also, it's fabulous.

How do I know that?

Because the cover says it is.

And it's not just Ka-Zar who's headlining a new book, this month - because Man-Thing issue #1 is now hitting a swamp near you.

And I must confess I don't really know what happens in this one either.

I do know that Howard the Duck's name is revealed.

But I too can reveal it.

It's Howard.

The Duck.

It would seem Daredevil and the Black Widow are also in this one. As well as someone called Dakimh the Enchanter.

It's unlucky issue #13 for someone when the Son of Satan has his second-ever adventure.

And it looks like that someone is Satan who still has to put up with his offspring's determination to slap him about a bit.

In truth, this is all an excuse to give us an origin issue in which we discover just where our favourite anti-hero came from and how his sister's involved.

Not only that but we learn from where he got his mighty trident.

Thor receives his own Marvel Treasury Edition but can even such a huge book contain whatever awesomeness a thunder god might throw at it?

Just about.

But only just.

Because we get a reprinting of the epic saga in which Thor and Hercules duke it out for the hand of Jane Foster, while Pluto sticks his shades on, heads for Hollywood and contrives to turn the Greek prince of power into a prisoner of Hades.

But, with his strength reduced by 50%, can the scion of Asgard hope to do more than merely annoy the brash Olympian?

Truly, we're being spoiled because now we're given a second Treasury Edition.

And this one seems to feature just about everyone.

We have the Human Torch and Spider-Man vs the Sandman.

Then, we get Daredevil's first-ever encounter with the Sub-Mariner, as brought to us by Wally Wood.

Next, the Black Widow encounters a villain called The Astrologer.

And, finally, the Hulk fights the Thing in a clash reprinted from Fantastic Four issues #25 and #26. Also starring the rest of the Fantastic Four and the Avengers and Rick Jones! And the Teen Brigade!!!

And another new mag hits the shelves.

And this too features the Man-Thing!

As far as I can make out, the Fantastic Four's Thing heads for Florida to punish the swamp monster for copying his name.

Seriously.

However, newly arrived from another dimension, the Molecule Man also finds himself in Florida. Surely, a three-way scrap can be the only outcome of this outcome.

Is there a human being alive who could say no to that cover?

No. There isn't. And so it is that the lord of all vampires finds himself up against a skeleton that's got loose on the streets of London.

But how can even Vlad himself hope to defeat a man who refuses to die?

My memories of what happens inside this book are a little vague but I do know it's the one in which Jack Russell first encounters Topaz and her power to calm the wildest of beasts.

And that has to be good news because he's going to need all her help to subdue the wildness of Taboo.

But everything we've seen, this month, pales into hopeless insignificance as we enter the comics event of the decade.

And that's Marvel Comics' tribute to Evel Knievel!

I can shed no light upon the activities of Evel in this comic but I do know he stars in a yarn called The Perilous Traps of Mr Danger! as written by a mystery scribe and drawn by Win Mortimer.

We also get a page titled Evel Knievel Bicycle Safety.

Somehow the words, "Evel Knievel," and, "Bicycle safety," don't feel like they belong in the same sentence.

January 5th 1974 - Marvel UK, 50 years ago this week.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

1974 may have been a bright new year for some but no sooner had the holiday period ended in Britain than the bad news arrived, with the UK entering its first post-war recession, thanks to government figures revealing the economy had contracted during the third and fourth quarters of 1973.

On the positive side, it was also the first year in which New Year's Day was celebrated as a public holiday. At least, in England. I don't know if it was already celebrated as such in Scotland where people had always made a bigger deal about the event than people in England had.

On the UK singles chart, the top spot still belonged to Slade and their festive smash Merry Xmas Everybody.

But there was change afoot on the British album chart, with Yes's Tales From Topographic Oceans climbing nine places to seize the Number One slot and make it clear to everyone that the Age of Prog was well and truly upon us.

It's not a great new year for the Hulk either. Looking to avenge his recent defeat at the brute's hands, the Mandarin decides that should he combine his might with that of the Sandman, they can finally succeed where each had failed alone.

Needless to say, he turns out to be wrong.

And not only that but I do suspect this is the tale in which Sandy falls into a hot vat of something or other and emerges from it having been transformed into Glassman. Surely, one of the great endings in comic book history.

Elsewhere, we get the conclusion of the story in which the superior intellect of  Reed Richards brainwashes Dr Doom into thinking he's finally destroyed the stretchy scientist.

So far, the Avengers' tactic of recruiting criminals has worked a treat, with Hawkeye, the Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver all coming up with the goods, however petulantly.

But this is where the flaw in the plan is exposed, when the Swordsman decides he too would like to join the gang, mostly in order to get his hands on an Avengers pass and use it to commit even more crimes.

Obviously, our heroes aren't fooled by such bare-faced cheek and it's within the blink of an eye that they're battling him and he's trying to kill them.

As for Dr Strange, all I can reveal about his adventure, this issue, is that he encounters, "The Demon's Disciple," and I only know that because it says so on the front cover.

Can it be true?

Yes, it can!

Doc Ock is back!

And he wants to steal a machine that can cause any piece of technology to fail in its duty!

Not only that but I do believe this is the saga in which he becomes Aunt May's lodger and is well on his way to becoming Peter Parker's step-uncle! Can Spider-Man's problems get any worse?

I'm betting that they can.

Thor, meanwhile, is still battling the Absorbing Man on the streets of New York. And he's got a problem too. Which is that he's unconscious.

Unconsciousness. The great leveller.

Fifty years ago today - January 1974.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

***

And here we go. A new year has smacked us in the face. Just as it did exactly fifty years ago. So, to learn how the world's changed in that intervening period, let's discover what the Marvel comics which flaunted that cover date were getting up to and whether we can draw any valuable life lessons from them.

The Vulture's still back - and he's still out to get Mary Jane for seeing him commit a murder!

Or is he?

I could be wrong but I think this tale's the first Whodunit The Amazing Spider-Man comic has ever attempted.

If it is, it's certainly not the last. Following on from this, there seems to be a spell where Peter Parker's alter-ego can't stop acting like an adolescent Columbo.

Then again, doesn't this issue's scripter Gerry Conway go on to write the Father Dowling Mysteries for TV? If so, it might explain a lot.

It's Halloween, and the Collector's back. This time, getting involved in that Rutland parade thing Marvel creators seem so keen on.

I don't recall what the villain's plan actually is but I do know he tries to defeat the world's mightiest super-team by firing a flock of bats at them.

The Committee to Regain America's Principles, led by Quentin Harderman, decides to discredit our hero. Thus, Harderman organises a charity fight between Cap and the Tumbler, during which the Tumbler is seemingly killed by the star-spangled shield slinger.

All I can confirm about this one is Conan spies for the Turanian army, kills Shamash the Terrible, incites civil war in the city of Wan Tengri and then frees its princess. Say what you like about him but he doesn't mess about.

Putting my critic's head on, I'd say there's far too much going on on this cover. Exactly what are we supposed to be focusing on?

As for the plot, Kerwin J Broderick merges with the monster Terrex and orders San Francisco to surrender or he'll kill everyone in it.

Captain Marvel joins the battle but success hinges on whatever's going on with Angar the Screamer.

Darkoth the death demon arrives from the very bowels of hell.

Or does he?

I've never read this one but have the idea in my head that Darkoth isn't a death demon at all and has been duped into thinking he is by the evil scheming of Dr Doom.

It's another belter, as the Rhino and Abomination take over Gamma Base - and only the Hulk can stop them.

But, given their stupidity, will he actually need to?

Thor's still battling against those aliens who are armed with giant vacuum cleaners.

Not only that but those very Hoovers are threatening to destroy all before them.

However, I'm more impressed by the fact that, for the first time ever, the thunder god's not declaring himself to be doomed, on the cover of his own book.

That's Marvel sorted out. But, as we all know, it's not the only kid on the block. That in mind, let's see what its big rival is presenting in a random smattering of comics which also bear a January 1974 cover date.

It's remarkable the memories a comic can bring back to you. I recall buying this one shortly before going into Timpson's shoe shop in Sheffield's exclusive Waingate area.

Granted, that's not what you could call an exciting anecdote but, fortunately, the contents of this book are far more exciting than even that, as a monster walks Wayne Manor.

The monster turns out to be Ubu - loyal manservant of Ra's al Ghul - who's gone a bit mad and glowing.

For some reason I can't recall, he's now blundering around in Bruce Wayne's otherwise empty former residence - and it's going to take all of Batman's sleuthing skills to thwart him.

Elsewhere, in his tale, the Atom helps Zatanna look for her father in a sub-atomic world ruled by a druid.

Then, Hawkman and Hawkgirl fight three aliens looking to dislodge Earth from its orbit

Next, Alfred's killed when rescuing Batman and Robin, thus setting into motion events that will culminate with the Outsider Saga.

Then, in a strange parallel to the opening Batman tale, the Green Lantern pursues a fleeing criminal to a deserted house that's designed to seem haunted.

And, finally, Manhunter's latest mission erupts when Interpol's Christine St Clair informs her boss that Paul Kirk still lives, is a master of Ninjutsu and has rapid healing abilities. However, after she leaves, her boss burns the file...

It's drama without equal when rebels decide to assassinate America's youngest-ever president because the commie pinko's aiming to outlaw guns.

And now it's The Witching Hour's chance to achieve the 100-page treatment.

I remember getting this one from the now-demolished indoor Sheaf Market before heading into the now-demolished indoor Castle Market. I can shed no light upon whether I went into Timpsons afterwards.

In this magnificent tome, we're offered such terrifying tales as Makers of the Mist!, 'Til Death Us Do Join!, The Ever Constant Drum!, Save the Last Dance for Me!, Eternal Hour!, The Perfect Surf or How to Make Waves Without Really Trying!, The Man with the Stolen Eyes, Brush with Death!, Dream Girl, The Demon in the Mirror!, The Phantom Ship, Round Trip to the Past! and Trail of the Lucky Coin!, mostly reprinted from a variety of 1960s and 1950s sources although two or three of them do appear to be new material.

But who needs a 100-page comic when there's a massive treasury edition of House of Mystery to wrap our peepers around?

And so it is that we get The House of Gargoyles!, The Secret of the Egyptian Cat, The Widow's Walk, His Name Is... Kane, The Devil's Doorway, The Poster Plague! and Nightmare.

Again, it's a book packed with reprints.

But there's a 3D diorama to be cut out and constructed and that has to make it worth $1 of anybody's money!

But who needs untrammelled horror when we could be encountering a shiny-nosed ungulate?

Despite, the cover's boast that these are, "New Giant Adventures," the tales within are all 1950s reprints.

And, just like with The House of Mystery, there's a 3D diorama for us to dig our scissors into!

I just hope the printers don't get the dioramas mixed up and put the wrong one in each book, or that could be highly confusing for the reader.