Fifty years ago today - April 1974.

Thanks to Charlie Horse 47 and Killdumpster for their sponsorship of this post, via the magic of Patreon. 

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April Fools' Day is come and gone but what fools we would be to not investigate what our favourite Marvel heroes were up to in magazines whose cover date is exactly fifty years ago.

The Avengers are still having ludicrous amounts of difficulty defeating Zodiac, despite the bad guys barely being able to muster a super-power between them.

However, I'm sure the good guys will triumph eventually.

But what's this? I do believe the cover image was also used on the front of one of Marvel UK's 1970s annuals.

Do I detect the hand of Neal Adams on this cover?

Of course I do.

Sadly, I also detect that it's an oddly static one, lacking our hero's usual eagerness to leap into the fray.

I've never read the tale inside but it would appear Conan and someone called Juma fight a giant slug and rescue someone called Yolinda from someone called Rotath.

It's time to stare up nostrils, as Gil Kane gives us Cap and Falc vs the Banshee.

Sadly, apart from that, I've no knowledge of what happens in this one.

And I must confess to knowing nothing about the contents of this one too.

But it seems the villain of the piece is called Ternak.

Hooray! The Cobalt Man's still causing trouble for the Hulk!

And for the city of Sydney, thanks to his bizarre bid to destroy it in order to show mankind the perils of atomic power.

Fortunately, as so often with nuclear scientists, his genius plan is thwarted when he explodes in the upper atmosphere.

The Freak is back!

But not the same one as before.

This time, it isn't Happy Hogan who becomes the unstoppable, mindless monster. It's Eddie March.

The injured man must have emergency surgery at the hands of Don Blake. To help the patient survive, Tony Stark recommends the use of his Enervator.

And it does exactly the same thing to Eddie that it previously did to Happy.

You have to hand it to Tony Stark, he's never encountered a mistake he doesn't want to repeat.

It's the story you never thought you'd see!

Mostly because it's ridiculous.

Aunt May's IQ drops so low you'd have to pull up the floorboards to find it, as she decides it'd be a good idea to marry Dr Octopus.

And Hammerhead demonstrates that he's even stupider than Aunt May.

By headbutting a nuclear reactor!

My knowledge of this one is limited but it's clear to me that it involves Hercules and Ares.

My memories of this issue are likewise vague. Is it the one in which the Mutant Master's revealed to be no mutant but an octopus from outer space who's then killed when his wheelchair blows up?

I do, however, know plenty about the backup strip in which the winner of the Mr Earth contest is contacted by aliens who want him to enter the Mister Universe competition.

Naturally, he agrees 

And that turns out to be a bad idea.

That's Marvel's big hitters all accounted for.

But what of its rival? Just how does a random sample of DC comics which also bear that cover date look?

It's one of everybody's favourites, as Neal Adams returns and a bat man must confront a wolf man when Anthony Lupus gets pressured into killing the detective in exchange for a cure for his condition.

It has struck me, many times, that this tale has the same ending as Hammer's Scars of Dracula and I've always wondered if the similarity is coincidence or homage.

We also get a tale in which Bruce Wayne discovers his own father once adopted the guise of Batman before his murder.

Following that is an adventure in which Alfred tries to convince his girlfriend he's secretly Batman.

Only to discover his girlfriend is secretly Catwoman!

Next, we're told the history of the Batmobile.

Then we're supplied with a tale called The True-False Face of Batman!

After that, Crazy-Quilt returns.

And, in our final yarn, the Outsider strikes again!

It's not just Batman who's getting a hundred pages dedicated to him, this month. So are the entire Justice League of America.

And they do it in style by investigating the murder of Santa Claus!

I don't recall the exact details of what happens but I know it involves the villainous Key and the not-so-villainous Phantom Stranger.

I think this might also be the first time the JLA meet the new Green Lantern.

And they also try to sort out some poverty, while they're at it.

That's followed by a veritable epic, The Plight of a Nation in which our heroes tackle juvenile delinquency in the United States, as well as someone called The Crimson Claw Gang who seem to be taking advantage of it for their own ends.

We finish off with a Zatanna reprint, as the mistress of the mystic arts enlists the aid of the Justice League in her latest attempt to locate her father.

And I have a feeling this might be the journey in which she actually finds him!

Jack Kirby's Sandman makes his dream-filled debut!

While monitoring the dreams of humans, he detects a strange nightmare experienced by a boy called Jed. This makes him leap into action.

And into conflict with someone called General Electric who's still miffed about Japan's defeat in World War II.

It's a dramatic cover for a not-quite-so-dramatic tale when the man of steel must thwart a gang of criminals called Protectors of Earth, Inc.

I seem to recall this involving a raid by the villains, on the S.T.A.R. Laboratory. An act which sees Superman get sucked into a black hole and stretched out like elastic.

Strangely enough, getting stretched out like elastic doesn't seem to do him any harm at all.

What kind of madman could see that Luis Dominguez cover and not buy this comic?

Not this kind of madman.

Needless to say, I spent my 20 cents on it the moment I clapped eyes on it.

In it, we get just two tales: The Invisible Enemy and The Last Battle.

Despite my love for this issue, I struggle to remember what either of those masterpieces involves. I know the first one stars a German. And, possibly, phantom tigers?

Does the second one centre around a tiny civilisation living on a golf ball?